CHAPTER 11
(2 days before...)
I've never really thought of Wayne breaking up with me too much. But since there's a party coming I've got thoughts running through my head of him hitting on Maddie and her letting it happen because she's my first and foremost enemy. I've gave him many signals that I don't like Maddie but it seems to me like he doesn't want to loose what they have.
I walked up to my balcony thinking what's going to happen today. I realized as soon as I woke up that today is a bad day. I feel like shit and everyone knows what that means. Junk food is my only cure. I called Wayne to come over and he reached right after he was done work. Around 8'ish. We both sat on the chairs in the balcony and I stared right into his eyes. My vision blurred and I then know tears were streaming down my cheeks that felt as if they were on fire. I didn't like the feeling the rushed through my guts, I didn't like the feeling of being insecure. It was too far ahead, I didn't want to feel love that would make me feel that way.
"We need to break up Wayne." I said with a sign. I noticed a look on Wayne's face. I saw him flexing his jaw out of anger. "Who do you like?" He asked fiery. "Michael?" He asked another question, almost in the mood to break down. "No! I feel as if you and Maddie have a thing going on. I don't feel comfortable, and I definitely don't want to worry about anything." I answered. "Why would you feel that? You know we're just friends. Yeah we might of liked each other earlier, and I understand that might be a little off in our friendship now a days. But you are what I'm into, I want to spend my life with you till my last breathe, I want to take care of you when you need me, I want to be there when you need me, I want you." He said passionately. "Wayne, I totally understand where your coming from and I understand that break ups are hard. You guys have broken up for a year now. As a girl I know that it takes more then a year to get over someone you've been with for a long time. I don't want this relationship to end this way, and I don't want to hurt you in anyway. But, I have to think about myself as well. I don't want to worry all the time. These past days she's been really touchy with you. You haven't done shit. I'm done Wayne. I'm sorry. I said, with a strong voice.
He walked downstairs to the kitchen and got a glass of water. "Wayne..." I stopped myself. "Why me? Why does it always have to be me always getting hurt?" He then showered his face with tears. I couldn't believe that I could cause him so much pain, and I didn't want to think that I could cause anyone that type of pain. I was broken. I walked up to him and hugged him tightly. I still loved him, and I'm still confused I said in my head. He hugged me tightly and he was really warm. I squeezed my face against his and hugged him back. He kissed my forehead and waited for my last words, "We just need a break, I need a little time to think. We're not over, but I am taking a break. I hope that's fine. I still love you." I said, crying my eyes out. "I know. I love you more, and I don't ever want this to end. Can I hug you again?" He asked. Without me saying a word he still did it. His fingers rushed down my back up and down and he wasn't letting go. I struggled getting out of his grip around me and looked into his eyes. I saw fear, fear of losing this relationship. He kissed me all over the face and hugged the the last time.
"I love you Michelle. Be careful." He said with a tone that surprised me after that big crying session.
