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It was the start of September marking my month at the Phoenix residence. Carter, Cameron, and Rylie all went back to school a few days ago. Mr. Phoenix was at work which left me in the condo alone. The first day it was amazing to have solitude. The second day it was still pleasant just a bit quiet. Now I reach my third day in the middle of the afternoon and the lonesome was affecting my psyche. I was paranoid. I could swear I would hear the elevator ding but nothing would come out of it nor did the doors open.
I wasn't as tired as usual. I was on my prescribed amount of medication. The affects weren't drastic but they were making a difference. All in all I was bored. Mr. Phoenix was working on my school situation and I'd have the information on that before the month was over. He said I'd probably be in school towards the middle of the month.
We decided that homeschooling would be best. I had expressed my concerns about being in such a populated area with him the night before. While he thought being around other students would be helpful I told him I saw it as a burden. He said I needed to make friends. I didn't disagree but frankly, I didn't care for people. I didn't care for the idea of friends. I couldn't really forge any relationships with anyone while being bounced around all the time.
Most of all, neither of us had any idea where my education level was at. I wasn't dumb. I just lacked. After ninth grade everything went downhill. I'd pop in and out and then stopped going all together a little bit after tenth. I was in too many schools to remember and couldn't track exactly which one could have my below average transcripts to send to a new one.
Above all, teens were cruel and it was more than likely I'd either have to start all over or repeat a grade. I wasn't keen on the idea of people finding out about that or my current living situation and ridicule or pity me.
My phone buzzes beside me. It was weird to say my phone. I hadn't actually had one. Besides the one I shared with Destiny whom was the first person I texted with the new device. The phone we shared was a prepaid minute phone from a dollar store. Her parents had given it to her and loaded it up monthly so they'd be able to contact her when needed. To say she was ecstatic to know we'd be able to communicate more often was an understatement. She had texted me all day and night for the last two days and I was sure it was her now.
She often would ask the question of when she'd be able to see me and I'd either skirt around it responding with the vague words of 'soon' and 'I'll have to see if I can.' Sometimes I'd ignore the text all together and change the subject as though I never saw the initial text in the first place. I wanted to see her. I really did. Pathetically, of all my years in the system the eleven year old soon to be twelve was my only friend.
But sooner rather than later she'd be with her family and friends back in Brooklyn and I'd just be the girl. The girl that was a distant memory. The girl that held her when she cried because she was afraid. The girl that shared her food. The girl that hid her and took her place when we were set to go on "dates." I was going to be the girl she told her parents and friends about when they asked about her time at the group home her first weeks back and then I'd be nothing.
