I'll never do it again

Untitled Part 11

Chapter eleven

Gees p.o.v

Chirp chirp chirp I startled awake

Wait that's not my alarm that's fucking bird noises am I hallucinating?

Wait who's bed am I in who's holding me wait that's Frank what? Oh. Oh no last night

Oh god I passed out last night is Frank okay ? What about Mikey oh god I fucked up

I was panicking and I really hadn't eaten anything Frankie was right my head felt weird too I really do need to eat now but Frank's asleep still I don't want to wake him up

Ugh life is confusing I laid back into franks arms he really did mean he wouldn't let go didn't he? I love him or do I ? Did he love me ? Is love real or a social construct I need a shower I gently pushed Frank's arms off me and wandered to the bathroom right next to Frank's room taking my cloths off and carefully folding them as I wou do have to put them back on when I was done I stopped at the mirror god I was ugly Might need food in order to not pass out but I sure as hell didn't need any extra calories

I can barely see my ribs if I was beautiful you'd be able to see my rib and hip bones and collar bones all the time not just when I was laying down I sighed turning the shower on cold getting in

Frank's p.o.v

I woke up without Gerard in my arms that was my first concern then I remembered why I was holding Gerard and that was my second concern his phone and sweatshirt were still next to the bed he was here some where then I heard the shower going

I sighed he was trying to wash Nikki off still I laid back into the bed considering whether I should get up I decided to try and make Gerard's life easier for him I got up and pulled cloths out of my closet my only Bowie shirt that Gerard had bought for me three years ago and a pair of black skinny jeans that were too big for me I figure that gee could change into those when he got out of the shower I put the cloths on the table outside the bathroom door to come back to I walked to the kitchen trying to figure out what an inexperienced eighteen year old boy could make for his boyfriend I found pancake mix that seemed relatively simple and managed to get it right...on the third try oh well at least I had it right I finished making pancakes and walked back to bathroom