Only Time Can Tell

SHE IS MY PRIVILEGE

FILLER 18

SHE IS MY PRIVILEGE

BORUTO UZUMAKI

"What is it you want to tell me, Boruto?"

I froze up. I knew that I would, but it was still shocking. It was like being caught with no air, or being busted by your mother, except perhaps a hundred times worse. Sarada just stood there, holding my hand, her eyes widened slightly more than normal, her lips pursed waiting for my response. No air. Suddenly my body threw me into a spasm of literal choking and Sarada only got more concerned. She touched my back and waited until I stopped coughing.

"The longer you make me wait the more horrifying my expectations will get. Boruto just please tell me."

"I uh--" My mind flashed to my master. Sasuke, her father, who had taught me all of the advanced jutsu that had saved my life over and over again, the man whom I had to ask for her hand, the guy who I owe so much more than my livelihood to.

His face had turned dark as he told me a story, the story that had plagued his mind for years. How he had left Sakura in the village, how he had widened the separation between them, and even began to paint himself as her enemy. How he convinced himself that he felt nothing for her.

"You can't leave Sarada like that. You-"

"I would never!" I cut him off, Sasuke's eyes silencing me.

"Boruto, you are going to be one of the strongest shinobi of your generation. Inspiring hundreds more after you. You have that about you, like your father did. With that power you have the ability to do more damage than good in anything that you do. Anything that you do will affect everything. Do you understand that?"

"Everything that I do will affect everything."

"Yes." Sasuke lowered his head slightly so he no longer met my eyes. "In many ways I am glad that you are not like me. You don't have cruelty built in your heart, or an iron wall that needs to be demolished to meet the man behind it. But that won't leave you safe from the weight of being powerful. You will want to do things, like leaving--no, like running away. Boruto, I ran away. I told myself I was making up for the things that I had done in my past, but that wasn't true. Sakura needed me. I left her to burden so much more.

Sasuke looked up to me, his eyes filled with a sadness immeasurable. "Do you know that whenever I touch my wife she flinches?" You could see the pain in his eyes as he said this, the shame that clouded his dark eyes. "That's how many times I've hurt her in my past. I've torn her down again and again. To what extent should she trust me even now? I once called her naive for her trust but it's not." He laced his fingers together. "It's bravery."

"The relationship I have with my wife is only possible because of how strong Sakura is. There is no doubting when you compare the two of us which is the most brave. Sakura's strengths held me together, whenever I seemed like I would fall apart. Sarada has those same strengths but I'm asking you...no matter how strong Uchiha may be, Sarada shouldn't have to be strong in the presence of the man she loves."

"I used to think that loving Sakura was like a mission, like some goal that held importance over all else. I was wrong. Loving my daughter-" Sasuke said meeting my eyes again with a stern weight, "is a privilege."

"Boruto are you okay? Are...you sick?" Sarada said her eyebrows furrowed in concern as she held my hand again, I could tell this time from the way that she leaned her hand against my inner wrist that she was checking my pulse. A habit that her mother had passed down to her.

"No. I'm totally fine. Sorry. I-" I stopped the train of thought that would have definitely crashed and burned and tried again. "Sarada, did your father ever tell you the story of how he left the village?"

Sarada's breath stopped for a second, and her fingers turned rigid. "He was always too ashamed to say much about it. He told me that he crushed my mother heart before he left, and that he left so many things behind, things that he didn't think that he had until it was too late. It was his pride that chained him to his decision." She let go of my hand and let it fall limply to her side. "It destroyed them both."

She was growing distant. She was expecting me to hurt her, putting on her stone face, anchoring herself firmly to the ground, bracing for impact. "It happened here. This is where he told your mother he was leaving. He told me the story."

"Why would he tell you?" Sarada said coldly.

I decided to ignore her question, I can't trip over my words now. My heart throbbed. "Before he left, your mom pleaded to him to stay, and then when all else failed to join him, to help him in his mission for revenge. No matter how dangerous it may have been. Her bravery wasn't misplaced. Look at them now. But your dad wants me to do things a little bit differently. Sarada..." I reached back into my pocket and felt my heart begin to hammer. "I...need to ask you to join me on one of the most dangerous missions of your life."

"I'm not helping you with revenge."

"That's not it-" I said my fingers tightening around the case. "Sarada-"

"Are you going to leave me here?" Sarada said her hands tightening into fists.

"Sarada--"

"Are you going to run away? Just like he did?" She began to cry right in front of me. I waited too long, I screwed up. That's what being poetic gets you.

"Sarada--"

"I- I can't handle being abandoned over and over again, Boruto. I can't! I'm--"

"Sarada! I'm not leaving you! Not ever." I said softening my voice, reaching out to her, and pulling her closer to me, helping her wipe away her tears. "Not at all. Sarada, I took you here because we're not like them."

"I'm here to give you my whole heart," I continued, "In the very same place where Sasuke was too afraid, because you are so worth it. Sarada," I took a step back and swallowed, the weight of the situation so much heavier than in practice with Hima. I nearly felt to my knees. "I love you more than anything I have ever known. And it's going to stay that way, forever. I look at you and I see the universe. I will never leave you. Loving you is my privilege. Sarada," I reached into my pocket, and in that moment it was effortless, opening the case and looking into her eyes filled with tears, her hand clasped over her mouth as the wind scattered the fallen leaves around us, her hair flowing in the wind, strands getting caught in her tears. She is the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. "Will you marry me?"