As long as it lasts (english)

00. Best friend.

Art by: marys-artwork

Jungkook

23/09/17

When I saw Jimin for the first time I found it charming, with his little clothes and that black hair. I was smaller but I was smart enough to know I was a good person.

'Don't tell Tae'  he said 'but you're my best friend'

'I thought your best friend was him' I said.

'Yes but that's different' to see my frown continued to talk 'is different'

I know what you meant, Jimin, I always knew. Tae was always the first.

Not that it bothered me, I mean, he introduced us but, I always wanted to be more.

Because I could see through you and he did not, it was not the same, it did not have to be different.

But your time wanted to stop the night of the 29 and got it, because we all have a timer. It starts when you give your first breath to the last one, and an accountant with red numbers stops.

I can not be so unimportant, I know what you had with Yoongi and Tae no, I knew many more things.

Because I knew secrets and yet I was less. You told them to me and you hid things from Tae, the important things. Because you were afraid that he would end up bad but you did not look for me.

'You are much more mature'

It hurts.

'-What is happening to you? I sat down beside you and asked, I saw how you hid your bony elbow and you smiled at me.

"It's all right, calm down."

"Promise me," you laugh and you do not look at me, I'm serious."

"No, Jimin, no. Promise me."

"Cookie is fine, I promise, I'm fine."

Lies.

You were not there. all right.

You lied to me.

I could take it as a good thing, because you wanted to lie to me and protect me, despite being more mature, because I was your best friend. But what good is now if I can not celebrate with you.

I will always be behind Tae, and although I feel important for the last lie you told me, nothing can ever compensate for that.

I leave class, sad, and decide to go to the place where you took me, I decide to steal from you and Yoongi that place to feel you, because I am also important.

-Hey what's up? -Yoongi just appears next to me and I look behind him, where Min looks at Tae.

I'm also behind in this.

-Nothing, just uh, I need to rest -I say not very convinced and I walk away. I'm sick of Tae and I'm sick of Yoongi and Min.

And I'm sick of this.

I walk quickly to the bus and give a quick look at the driver with my card, I sit and wait. When I'm half asleep and there are no people I get down and the bus turns in the big roundabout, disappearing

I walk on the wheat and carry my backpack, I grind the wheat and walk along the small narrow road when I approach, I see flowers and the big tree. When I get closer I see a backpack on the floor and Yoongi leaned where the other day, right in front of the bank. That must be his place.

-And at last you get -he talks before I get to him - I've come before and all.

-How did you get here before I did? - I ask leaving my jacket and my backpack next to his.

-You've taken the long road, stupid -he looks at the landscape and does not take her mind off- I've had time to think.

Yoongi is amazing, he's like a little sage who knows everything, insults you and sometimes looks like a father. All in one.

-What were you thinking?

-In you, in the landscape -you drop your weight more and sigh- in Jimin ...

I hear it but I do not say anything.

-I know what you think -I laugh as I listen, if he really knew- it's just a phase Kook.

I frown.

-What do you mean? -he laughs without grace and this time he looks at me, he passes his eyes from my forehead to my chin.

-You can be as clever as you want, but you have years to go -He touches my cheek with a small smile and looks back at the landscape- When you think of Jimin, you go through several phases.

I pay attention and swallow before continuing.

-First: shock, second: panic then mixed feelings like anger that you are going through you or sadness. Depending on how death was, you can have nightmares or traumatic memories, then grief and crying until you get to where I am.

-Where? -I breathe out a breath of air and see his black eyes.

-The defeat.

I think about it, I can be mature but I will never reach the conclusions Yoongi arrives, because he will already be ahead. I lost my best friend, Tae to his brother and the boys to a close friend but Yoongi ... to lost the love of his life.

I think of Tae and Min and how I have to talk to my cousin because I do not want to let her escape and I think she has noticed me, she can help us both but she can only be with one.

I look at his profile and as he looks ahead, they are eyes of someone who is enduring the unbearable. I can not help the tears when they arrive, he turns to me and without saying anything he rests his hand on my back when I go under my head. I choke on my own air and groan in protest.

Because as much as I want to hate my cousin or Jimin.

Now I am crying for Yoongi.