alive ↠ hs

.07

Harry's POV

My usual mood was replaced with an upbeat one. I was ready to get the supplies for the three of us and get back to warm and comfy house with Saige. And Asher, of course. 

I knew that it would take a few hours to scavenge and I was hoping that she would still be there when I got back. Saige was different than most people I've met, there was something about her that I saw in myself. Her need to protect everyone, even herself. Her independence even when she needed someone to be there for her. 

I could see pieces of myself in her and had this overwhelming urge to protect her as if she was apart of me. She contained the last bit of sanity I had within myself.

I finally got back to the house after a few hours, Geek blood covering my shirt. I had taken the jacket off because I knew that it was important to Saige; I could see the look on her face when she gave it to me and I didn't want it o get dirty.

When I came through the door, Saige was pacing in the living room, worry written all over her face. Her gun came up, aiming at me as I dropped my bags, raising my hands.

When she hugged me, I didn't know what to do. It was the only human contact I'd had in months, I didn't know what to do, I froze. She could tell because she pulled back, apologizing. I wanted to tell her not to, to come back, but I said nothing, only talking about the things I'd found.

Saige was quiet the rest of the night, shockingly enough. I could tell she was lost in her thoughts, the way her brows furrowed together, chewing on her bottom lip. 

"Don't worry, she does that all the time," Asher said to me, taking a spoon full of my chicken noodle soup. "She has a lot going on up there all the time."

She was obviously long gone because she didn't even hear Asher talking about her. 

"What's her thing?" I asked. "Mental? P-"

"No, no," he chuckled. "She just thinks too much, over analyzing. She majored in Psychology before all of this."

"Do you know what happened to her family? Why she's alone?" I asked him. 

Asher looked down. "I don't think that's my business to tell."

I cocked my head to the side, raising my eyebrows. "You don't even know, do you?"

"I know some, yeah," he explained. "Not all of it, it was too traumatizing for her."

Saige got up, grabbing a bottle of water before sending a small smile to the two of us. "What're you two talking about?"

"Music, seems Harry here was a music geek." Asher said as I snapped my head to him.

Even though I hadn't said anything, he still somehow noticed. 

"Oh really? What're your favorites?"

"Um, my favorites are the Beatles, Elvis, Coldplay," I said to her, not meeting her eyes. "I like Pink Floyd and Ed Sheeran as well."

"I love Elvis!" she grinned, a smile spreading across her previously frowning lips. "What's your favorite song?"

"My favorite has always been The Girl of My Best Friend, but I love most of his songs."

"Blue Suede Shoes and Devil in Disguise with always be my favorite." Saige smiled, obviously fascinated by music.

"Wow, you two are annoying," Asher said, pulling himself to his feet. "I can't sit here and listen to this."

"What? You like Britney Spears!"

"Hey, it's Britney, bitch!" Asher shot back to Saige, an evident smile on his face. "I'm sorry I know what actual music is."

"Please." I chuckled, rolling my eyes.

"Okay, pretty boy, we can fight if you want to." 

Saige laughed again, clapping her hands together. I knew he was joking, but a frown took spot on my face. Asher started to remind me of Niall, the blonde hair, blue eyes, and the jokes, it was Niall in a nutshell. He used to make the stupidest jokes, sometimes they weren't even funny, but I laughed just to make him happy. He'd laugh at anything I said, his laugh was too contagious not to return one.

"Harry, where'd you go?" Saige asked, waving a hand in front of my face.

I was so deep in thought, I hadn't realized she was talking to me. Asher wasn't in the room and Saige had changed into a large sweater than I had found earlier today and jeans and boots.

"Sorry." I shook my head, running a hand over my hair.

"I do that a lot too." She said, sitting on the floor, her back pressed against the couch.

I raised my eyebrows in question. "Do what?"

"Get lost in my thoughts," she said, wrapping her arms around her knees, pulling them into her chest. "I think too much, as Asher says."

"He talked about that earlier." I said to her.

"He did? I didn't hear him."

"You were too busy up here." I said, touching my temple.

"Per usual," she chuckled. "What were thinking about?"

"Um.." I trailed off, not looking at her. 

"It's okay, you don't have to tell me." She quickly said.

After that, the two of us sat in silence for a few minutes, just the comforting crackle of the wood from the fireplace filling the room, along with it's heat.

Saige's eyebrows were furrowed again and I could only guess that she was thinking again. 

"Asher reminds me of my friend Niall." I said, nearly choking on his name.

Saige looked up at me, her eyes meeting mine. She was taking it all in, she wanted to know more about me, and I wanted her to know more about her.

"Niall was funny, he was loud, he was a big sweetheart, but that wasn't good enough," I said, my smile faltering. "It's my fault he's dead."

"Harry.." Saige said, scooting closer to me. "I'm sure that's not true."

"I was their leader, they looked up to me, and I let them down," I said, looking down at my fingers. "I let Louis down, Liam, Zayn, and-and Niall."

She wrapped her arms around me for the second time, squeezing so tight, I thought all my broken pieces would fit back together by the squeeze of her arms. This time, I didn't pull away, I let her hug me. 

Only for a little bit. Feeling this way about someone make me vulnerable. Weak. Put a target right in the middle of my forehead.

I pulled myself away, getting to my feet before clearing my throat. "I'm gonna get some fresh air."

"Harry-"

"Get some sleep, I'll take the first watch."