alive ↠ hs

.36

Four Weeks Later

I knocked hard on the door, waiting for James to open the door. 

Today was the wedding. Today was the day I was going to kill James.

I had been planning for weeks. After Harry died, I couldn't grieve. I didn't have time to be able to think about how I had lost him. James forced me on my feet, making me work harder than usual.

He could tell I was absolutely broken and it made him angry. He knew I loved Harry. Not Jay. Not him.

Melody dressed me in the large white dress they chose for the wedding. My hair was styled half up, half down since they didn't have enough to style it.

I had gotten angry at myself, desperate for a change to my life and took a knife to my hair. I had just enough just to the reach my shoulders, Asher fixing it for me. I didn't like what I had seen what I looked in the mirror.

If I wouldn't have put myself in the position to be hurt again, I wouldn't be dreading each morning when I awoke. To live a world that he didn't. Harry was the love of my life, he was everything I needed to keep going.

After James took that, I wasn't sure if I wanted to go on. Everyone died, I did eventually. What was the point of surviving if we're all going to die anyways?

I had thrown myself into danger too many times but I always returned unscathed. I wanted to die but they always found a way to make sure I lived.

This was my punishment for Harry's death. For all the people that I hurt. Living was a worse punishment than death. Death was ending my suffering, suffering was the way I learned from my mistakes.

Everyone was gathered outside, waiting for me to arrive. Melody shoved a bouquet into my hands, pushing me towards the doors. I nearly rolled my eyes as the door opened and everyone's eyes fell on me. Applause broke out as I walked down the aisle, kicking the front of my dress to walk.

Jay was standing at the end of the aisle, a fake smile plastered across his stupid face. I wanted to pull these heels from my foot and stab it into his neck. I arrived as Jay took my hands into his, meeting my eyes.

I couldn't help but visualize him as Harry. Marrying him was a dream I had. I wanted to spent the rest of my life with him, not forced to marry this stupid asshole. I forced a smile as James' eyes fell on me. He smirked as I looked up at Jay.

His brown eyes me mine, making me roll my eyes.

"We are gathered here today to bring together two lovely people," the guy said from beside me. "We are here to gather Saige and Jay in love and faith, creating our new leaders here today."

Jay squeezed my hand and smiled at me, nearly making me tip over with annoyance. I just wanted to get this over with and leave. I wanted to go back to my apartment and wallow in despair with what I've got to live with.

"With that, Jay, you may kiss your bride to seal the marriage."

He leaned forward to kiss me. As his lips brushed mine, a sudden loud booming filled the air, knocking Jay and I off our feet.

I fell against the ground, my head banging against the street. My head was spinning and my vision was blurring as I struggled to pull myself to my feet.

My ears were ringing as I took in the scene around me. All people were on the ground around me, their screams echoing off my ears as the street slowly filled with crimson color.

A bomb.

I looked around, Jay was on the ground near me, blood surrounding his body. Dead. He was dead.

Asher.

I searched the scene for Asher's blonde hair. "Asher!"

I pushed past people, my ears still ringing as I saw him. I let out a sob as I wrapped my arms around him. 

"I'm okay," he breathed, hugging me back. "I need to find Andrew."

He searched for Andrew as I helped people gather themselves, Doctors tending to the wounds. I fell to my knees beside a girl who had blood rushing from her arm. I ripped a piece of cloth from her shirt before tying it around her arm.

"I don't want to die!" she cried. "Please don't let me die, please!"

I pushed her hair from her face, looking into her eyes. "You're not going to die."

The wound was deep enough to where I could see the white part of her bone. I turned away, biting my lip hard to keep from reacting. This wasn't good.

I could tell she was becoming lightheaded from blood loss, her skin starting to pale. "No, c'mon, stay with me."

She mumbled something but I couldn't hear. I was too busy trying to save her life. "C'mon, don't give up on me."

I pushed down hard on her wound, furious to stop the blood loss. "Fight!"

I pressed my hand into her neck, praying that I found a heartbeat. But I didn't.

I started CPR, struggling to revive her. "C'mon."

I felt someone lay a hand on my shoulder. "Saige, she's gone."

I snapped around at his voice, meeting James' eyes. "Did you do this?"

He scoffed, taking in the scene around him. "Of course I didn't."

As he followed the line of people that were injured, I could see something different on his face. Not rage or smugness, it was something like sorrow. Loss.

He didn't do this. I stood up beside him, looking up at him. "Tell me what's going on right now!"

He sighed heavily before pulling me into the nearest building, looking around before to me. "You cannot tell anyone."

"Who am I going to tell?" I rolled my eyes.

He sighed again, rubbing a hand over his face. "There's another camp out there."

"What?" I stepped towards him. "There's more survivors?"

"Yes," he nodded. "But they're jealous of our community, they're trying to take it."

"Then we fight." I said to him. "No one else needs to get hurt."

A smile slowly spread across his face. "There's the princess we need."

"Oh, please," I growled. "I'm not doing it for you."

I hurried back out to the scene of the accident, looking for anyone who needed me help. 

My eyes fell on Jay's body, a smirk settling on my lips. 

One down, one to go.