All Over Again

Part 6

I walk in my apartment slamming the door behind me and walk into the bedroom tossing my purse onto the bed and start yanking off the clothes I'm wearing and toss the shirt to the ground where I abandoned my shoes.   "Well okay then."  I jump when I hear his voice clutching my shirt over my chest and glare at him, before stomping towards him and shove him out the door yanking it closed behind me.  "Come on, Cas.  It's not like I haven't seen it  before."

I chew my lip and quickly change into a pair of sweats and a loose fitting shirt.  I grab the sweatshirt I'd been wearing previously and hold it in my hands for a moment, and stare at it.  Shaking my head, I open the door and walk past Matthew into the living room where I place the item on the back of the couch and walk into the kitchen where I dig through the cupboards and find the jar of tea bags.  I sort through before deciding on a orange spice tea and grab my mug filling it with hot water. I slide the tea bag down into the steaming water and sigh. I close my eyes remembering the times I would sneak over to Matthews apartment when we were first married.  Before I left.  I slide down against the cupboards and let out a shaky breath.  "Cassie, honey?  Hey, you okay?"  I look over at him and push myself back up and check my tea.  

"I'm fine Matt.  Did you need something?"  I glance over at him before turning back to my mug and pulling out the tea bag and setting it on a plastic lid so I can use it a second time.  

"Other than to talk to you, no I don't need anything."

"I already told you, there's nothing else to talk about.  We got married, I left because it was the best thing and I'll sign whatever papers you ask me too.  But I've messed up enough for ten life times, so I'm done.  I'm not going home.  We don't need to have this conversation."  I say exasperated.  

"And I said, we are discussing this because we aren't done.  I still love you Cassandra.  I don't know how you feel, one moment it seems one way and the next moment it's another.  We can figure this out, hon.  If it's your brother I'll talk to him, I'll take the brunt of it."

"It's not just him.  It's everyone, they've all made it clear how much they don't care about me.  Just leave it.  Go home and be happy."  I turn around staring out the widow as I sip my tea.

"Clearly you aren't understanding.  Cas, I've been trying to figure out where you were and why you left for three years.  I don't get it, but I want to.  I want us back sweetheart."

I slam my mug down on the counter causing hot water to splash out on my hand and over my arm as the mug tips, but I don't notice.  "In case you can't tell, there isn't an us anymore.  Maybe there never has been.  You can stop playing this damn game and leave me to die like everyone else!  Nobody else hunts me down to try and get me to come back so clearly no one cares!  They never have! Besides you never came looking before!  Just go home Matthew!  You can find someone you deserve, instead if my worthless whore of a self!"  I turn and yank away as he tries to grab me and race into the bathroom closing myself in and locking the door.  I slide down against the door and shake as the sobs rake my body.  "Nobodies ever needed me or wanted me.  I'm better off on my own."  I whisper under my breath and curl into a ball on the cold tile floor.  

"You can sit in there if you want to Cas, but I'm not going anywhere."  

A while later I sit up wincing at the pull in my neck from being in one position for to long.  I stand and lean on the counter looking in the mirror.  I frown as I stare at the tear tracks down my face, turning on the sink I splash my face with water and hiss in pain as the water makes contact with the burn on my hand and wrist.  

"Cassie, hey let me in."  I flinch at the sound of his voice before slowly opening the door.  "What happened?"  He gently reaches over and rubs his thumb under my eyes.  He carefully lifts my hand from the sink and looks over the burn.  "Here, sit on the counter.  Do you have a first aide kit?"  He puts his hands on my hips and lifts me up and sets me on the counter.  

"Uh, yeah it's in the hall closet on the second shelf."  He nods and turns leaving the room, and my sides suddenly feel cold at the loss of contact.  He returns moments later with the box and sets it next to me on the counter before opening it and sorting through the contents.  Finding what he was searching for he places it on the counter and washes his hands.

"This will probably be cold, and may sting."  He tells me as he tears open the burn cream, and squeezes a small amount onto the inflamed area of my skin.    I watch as his fingers gently rub the cream into the skin, relishing in the brief contact.  He grabs a bandage and places it over the affected area carefully covering it from any germs. He places his hands again on my hips lifting me down from the counter.  This time he holds me close for a moment before releasing me and turning to wash his hands again.

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