Curiosity Cures; Curiosity Kills

You told me you were okay.

⚠️could be triggering; based around worrying, anxiety, and depression⚠️

Regardless of what you tell me, that will never stop me worrying. It's just a part of who I am- a worrier. I first met you  and I worried you wouldn't accept me. We both began to discover who we were and I worried that you would think I was being petty. I began opening up to you and began worrying that you would tell people. More and more people began opening up to you and I was worried it all became too much. But these people are your friends here for you. The sudden trips to head of years or anyone authoritative makes me worry about you. Me sharing my problems makes me worry what it's doing on you. You say it's okay and I worry it's not. I began seeing you deteriorate and I tried to help but you would lose it, forget it and hide away- making me worry that it's me who is the problem and making other things worse. I worry every time I'm in the wrong and that I'm going to lose you forever. I worry every time you're not following your general organisation as I fear the worst. I worry that things are too much at home or at school. I worry that sometimes things are too much for you and that you're trapped, only for me to see your arms the next day when maybe you think I'm not looking. When really, I am. I'm worried what you think of me, I'm worried that you won't take my problems as real. I worry relentlessly- about so many people and you are top. You mean the world to me, and I worry continuously that I will lose you the way I lost others- sudden and without warning. I worry what I do to you but I worry because I care. I hope you see that too, but maybe I do overthink- but it's because you mean that much to me.  I worry about this shit, I worry about everything. If I worry about myself then I'm selfish. If I worry about others I'm stupid for worrying about things that supposedly don't need worrying about. OF COURSE I'm going to worry about others, I DON'T WANT PEOPLE BEING HURT. 😌