Good morning hey hello it is almost 3:30am and I am so overwhelmed with setbacks I thought I might write them down here. If you don't like worrying, or perhaps get anxious or easily overloaded with a big list of my worries- then this is a potential trigger ⚠️ if not, feel free to read on through my 3:30am mind and not being able to sleep.
Worried for year 10
•stress
•anxiety
•loneliness
•relapse
•not performing to my full potential
•not allowing myself enough time
•not always being the best
•holding on to things that I need to let go
•not getting the grades I need
•not getting a second chance
•not having a backup option
•not being comfortable where I am
•not being 110% likeable 24/7
•always studying. always
•getting food poisoning from being made to eat school canteen food
•being a nun. On stage. In sparkly habits. #SHSGSisterActCast2018
•missing too much school for appointments and then messing up my GCSEs
•taking food-tech and not knowing when an avocado is or isn't fucking ripe.
******************************************
Worried for year 11
•no time left to revise
•what if I still don't understand??
•not passing GCSE's
•not enjoying my last year
•turning 16
•results day
•stress
•anxiety
•loneliness
•relapse
•exhaustion
•last year to not fuck things up
•still not knowing the ripeness of an avocado
•if or if not I can get my braces off
•wondering if I still know how to use the DT workshop
•coursework?? I still don't know??
******************************************
Other dilemmas
•worrying when things don't go to plan
•losing motivation
•falling off schedule
•getting the yucky white bits when they take braces off because it's physically impossible to get an interdental brush back there, let alone a normal toothbrush
•not being accepted for shadowing/work experience
•recognising a peer during shadowing
•recognising a friend during shadowing
•recognising a teacher during shadowing
•what if my feelings for subjects suddenly change
•financial crisis
•If Britain is or isn't still in Eurovision because of brexit.
•knowing that a Jaffa cake is a cake but for some reason I am always wrong? 😒 fucking says cake on the box you JaffaPrick
•ruining my attempt at recovering by avoiding breakfast because I didn't know the fucking ripeness of an avocado
•wondering how many of my peers are pursuing the same career as me
•how many ibuprofen is too many?
•do fish have belly buttons?
•how to drag myself back up from hell
YOU ARE READING
Curiosity Cures; Curiosity Kills
NonfiksiA book about the ups and downs of whatever is happening, and a places for me to show you my pictures ? if any parts are perhaps triggering, there I'll be a warning at the beginning of the chapter with ⚠️ so you can just skip past x
