✔️ F is for Fandom -Fandom Jokes and Randomness

Harry Potter-Jokes

Hi there! Read! Found these mostly off of Tumblr. Credit to those people. 

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Just imagine:

Sirius Black high-fiving Lily Evans every time she raises her hand in class.

Sirius asking James to high-five her whenever he's to sick to come to class.

Remus Lupin doing it with a sigh and an immediate apologize when neither Sirius nor James was available.

Peter being overenthusiastic about being asked to do it, and slapping Lily in the face by accident.

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Do you think like,

when Hogwarts was sending more and more letters to Harry in more and more ridiculous ways and Mr Dursley was just losing his mind

that Dumbledore was just sitting in the Headmaster's office

Giggling

I can totally see this

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I've got a really deep post for you

Ginny Doesn't like mayonnaise.

Isn't that deep?

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 Dean and Seamus realize they're in love after the Battle of Hogwarts, and move in together in a Muggle neighborhood and Dean becomes an artist and he takes Seamus to football games and Seamus decides he loves football and they live happily ever after

awww

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The marauders tended to have parties in the common room on the nights following Quidditch matches. James would drunken flirt with every girl other than Lily, which is why she turned him down so much.

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Dear father,

I'm sorry you have to hear this, but it needs to be said: Frankly, I prefer oranges.

Sincerely, Scorpius

XD #Drapple is feeling down 

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Drapple is still a better love story than Twilight

Everything is better than Twilight

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Snape: I can't stand this classroom romance Draco! The apple is now banned from the lessons, or I'll eat it.

Draco: Apple is not an 'it' she is a she! Just wait till me father hears about this!

Lucius: I already have, and I must say I find this whole somewhat disturbing

Dumbledore: Now now, Lucius, let us not be to hard on the boy.

Lucius: If I end up with half-fruit grandchildren, Dumbledore, you are dead.

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Prisoner of Azkaban continues to be the most frustrating book

Someone should have just adopted Sirius and started calling him Gerald.

Remus: Erm... this is our new order member, my... cousin Gerald. Gerald White.

"Mr. Lupin that is Sirius Black with glasses!"

"Oh come now Minister, Sirius Black doesn't wear glasses. That wouldn't make sense."

"Well have Mr. White take off his glasses then!"

"He can't he needs them to see."

it got better

It's honestly a miracle to me that wizarding society doesn't collapse every other week because like

You've got this world full of people who can destroy whole buildings or turn people into beetles or make vehicles fly just by waving a stick at them 

And there is literally no common sense 

Anywhere to be found

Voldemort would never have had anyone find out he was back if he just went around calling himself Steve

Okay, see, I thought I saved this post to comment on it but I'd like to bring up

The Minister would NEVER EVER disbelieve in Gerald White. He'd buy it hook line and sinker. The wizarding world would buy it hook line and sinker. The GOBLINS wouldn't but wizards have been shown to be pretty blindingly clueless. Still, Gringotts would grudgingly give Sirius access to the Black fortune.

But, but, but, you know the one person

the one person

who Gerald White would drive AB-SO-LUTELY FLIPPING CRAZY?

Severus Snape.

Snape would do everything, EVERYTHING, to get people to believe that it's Sirius. But the Order would ignore it (they accepted Sirius as Sirius before anyway) and Remus would just be so... so affronted.

'Severus, he is my cousin.'

And Sirius would love it. He'd love the fact that Snape just hated it. He'd be the BEST DAMN GERALD WHITE EVER b/c Snape is doing everything from dropping veritaserum into his firewhisky to capturing a dementor in a box and releasing it on Sirius when he least expects it

That one causes problems for a bare minute because SHIT A DEMENTOR ATTEMPTED TO GIVE GERALD THE KISS MAYBE SNAPE IS RIGHT except Harry comes forward and is like 'excuse me, I've never committed a crime and dementors are ALWAYS attacking me, I think they're attracted to glasses'

and the magical community is like 'shit, yeah, you're right'

and just

Snape goes crazy

YASSSSSSSS

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Thanks for reading

-Blue Raven