The Painter's Amour

His Dream

Chapter 22: His Dream

“My heart only ever had one thought, one want and one need. Despite all and in spite of all, all my heart ever wanted is you.” – Stephanie Laurens

Julian Hartwell

Music. What was it to you? To some people, it was an inspiration while to some it was their passion and their life. Music made by single or different unique instruments was an art itself. An art of uniting sounds into melody and melody into songs, a wonderful art indeed.

What was music to me? It was my heart.

Music had what my heart had, feelings. Every soft and deep tune was like my heartbeat, it resonates within me. Music speaks the silent words my mouth can’t and it tells the secret my heart keeps.

It fills me and it also empties me.

I succumbed on the comfort of my seat as I watched a man, a little older than me, played a harp instrument on the theater stage with his fingers dancing tenderly on the dozens of strings.

“It’s beautiful.” I stared in daze until a hand held mine.

“I know but you are a lot better, Julian, so don’t be antsy.” I heard Lucas said beside me, my eyes still glued on the harper’s long fingers.

“I’m not. It just... enchanting that’s why.” I mumbled in reply, trying to be as quiet as possible to avoid distracting the concentration of the musician.

The pleasant sounds bounced on the thick wall of the auditorium and it echoed across the dark room with the only lights left open centered on the stage. People seated in front of me remained static up to the end of the harper’s incredible performance and applause followed soon after.

Lucas let go of my hand to give the man applause too. “I can’t wait to see you perform on that stage also.” he said excitedly and that made me stifle a laughter.

The employer then called on for the next performer which was a man in his late thirties and judging by the instrument he’s holding, he was a guitarist no doubt. The man climbed up the platform and took the center of the stage with confidence.

He began to play his music piece and I watched again attentively.

This theater audition was going to take a while because I was not the only one who wished to perform.

I inhaled a deep breath, doing everything I can to keep my courage intact since this was the second time I’ll play in front of people although it was not about it that I was nervous of rather because this was the first time I came to a demo like this.

“Is it a must for me to do this?” I asked to no one, still unsure whether I want to do this or should I say something I never once thought of doing in this lifetime.

Sure I perform on orphanages of my own accord to please orphans who lost their families or those unfortunate children that were left and abandoned by their loved ones but that was all it was, therefore to use my talent for something else was strange for me.

 It felt odd because I was already content of what I do for my profession.

Even if I don’t earn an income out of it, I was still satisfied. After all I was an optimistic kind of man and I can find happiness on the simplest beauty from the things I like and affections from the people I love. To put it simply, I was a man with only simple dreams and ambitions.

“Such a rare opportunity like this? Of course it is a must.” Lucas murmured, he probably heard me and realized my uncertainty.

I turned to look at him. “I am content of who I am. To be a famous musician is not something I dream for myself. Indeed it is nice to be one but I don’t want to be.” I said in stern expression.