Devoid

JENNIE AND LISA

"Do you have a boyfriend Ate Jennie? Or have you ever had one?" Lisa asked as she is sipping her margarita. We are currently at the bridal shower of my childhood friend Solar, who also happens to be the cousin of this lady beside me.

"Is that a sarcasm or sarcasm?" I replied.

"Naaaaw."

She's tipsy.

"Okay... I had relationships back in college but never serious ...just pure fun."

"Really? Wow, I'm amused. All along I thought you just loved studying and never thought of entering a relationship eveeeeer. Shocks, you even took your Masters in Comm right after your graduation. That's so sick but I'm in awe."

"Why, thank you."

"I have a proposal to offer."

Kumunot ang noo ko. Pinagsasabi ng batang 'to?

"You know what, since I was a kid, I have always adored you. I like how you dress up, how you speak in a British accent yet can still converse in Tagalog flawlessly, how you intellectually carry out your point... I don't know, you are the next person that I look up to next to my ate. Hmmm... and since wala ka namang boyfriend ngayon, can we pretend like were girlfriends? You know, like ate Irene and Seulgi? Aww no, not pretend... because I want the real thing with you... So Ate Jennie Jill Carlisle, will you be my girlfriend? Because I really like you...," she continued.

I don't know what to respond to her words. Should I be flattered? Should I feel awkward? Should I tell her na naguguluhan lang siya at baka naooverwhelm lang siya sa recent na pag-out ng kapatid niyang si Irene na best friend ko rin? Should I say yes? Because, duh... hindi ko pa naranasan na makipagrelasyon sa aking kapwa babae at baka mas exciting ito? Should I say no? Because duh again... I don't wanna be a part of your experiment, kid.

But before I could even utter a word, she crushed her lips to mine. And though no formal agreement was settled, the proposal that she offered has been established in our minds.

It's been two years since Lisa and I have been together. She is now 22 years old while I am three years her senior. Kasalukuyan akong nagtatrabaho bilang head writer ng isa sa pinaka-nangungunang TV stations sa bansa. Minsan ay naghohost rin ako ng ilang shows at major events sa loob at labas ng kompanya. My girlfriend, on the other hand, is a professional tennis player, coffee shop owner, model, social media influencer, and a DJ.

The early stage of our relationship was wild and adventurous. We would do road trips, unplanned beach getaways, laugh under the pouring rain, sleep at the back of my pick-up under the moonlight with an empty beer can in our hands, make out in dressing rooms and public comfort rooms, and other things that I never imagined me doing ever. In fact, we even live under the same roof.

We spent our first anniversary at the farm of my paternal grandparents in Wales. Hinding-hindi ko makakalimutan ang mga sandali namin doon dahil feeling ko doon lang kami naging lubusang malaya na ipahayag ang aming nararamdaman sa isa't isa. Hindi naman tago ang aming relasyon lalo na sa aming pamilya at malapit na kaibigan. Pero hindi rin ito sobrang open para pag-piyestahan ng mga tao lalo na't isang public figure si Lisa. Kumbaga ay "what you see is what you get" ang aming pinapakita sa madla.

Everything has changed when she decided that she wanted to explore more of her potential and I became too busy with work. It started on our 18th month, I guess. She's often irritated over simple things that she would throw all the blame on me. Wala naman akong magawa kundi tanggapin lahat ng tanrums at inis niya. Hindi ko rin maiwasan minsan na makisabay rin dahil sino rin naman ang hindi maiinis nang ginaganun diba?

Ang simpleng mga inis at tantrums niya ay nadagdagan ng pagbigay niya ng maliit na oras sa akin samantalang ako kahit malate sa trabaho ay ihahatid ko pa rin siya, kahit hindi pa ako nakapagbreak ay dadalhan ko siya ng kape at pagkain dahil alam kong kulang siya sa tulog, at kapag naman may nakalimutan siya sa practice ay ihahatid ko kaagad ang mga hindi niya nadala.

I know I sound like I'm complaining but I'm not. All those efforts, although they appear excessive at times and that I do not receive a proportionate amount from her, I still enjoy doing them for her because, at the end of the day, I know that I'm doing it for the one I love the most. Kasi para sa akin, Lisa is not a typical kind of girl. She is humorous, free-spirited, sweet, friendly, loving, talented and spontaneous. Yun siguro ang ilan sa mga dahilan kung bakit natutunan ko siyang mahalin hanggang sa minahal ko siya ng lubos kahit unusual yung pagsisimula ng relasyon namin. Yun nga lang, miminsan ko na lang makita ang mga iyon sa kanya ngayon. But I love her nonetheless and I know that she will have a special portion in my heart even if we will end up being apart.