How To Love Someone

Without Crawling Through Dirt

Chapter One:)  

Hope you like it.  

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"Luke!" Pants, footsteps, running through the dark forest, tailing after my prey. My eyes were narrowed, I was determined to catch him, make him see what he was doing. Make him see that he was hurting me. 'What are you doing?!' Confused thoughts ran through my already clouded head. I wanted him, but I didn't want to force him into anything either! I just...I didn't know what was wrong with me. I just kept running through the night, my footsteps seemingly so far away as I heard the beating of my heart in my ears. 

Tears and sweat on my face. Why did things go like this?! He should have returned the love to me! I was being selfish, I didn't see it. I was blinded by the 'love' I felt for my best friend, the one who had said he'd be my savior...That day we met. It was fate. I knew it. That day...Under the willow, when I gave you a piece of my bread...Didn't you feel it too? That magic in the air. 

There came a soft yell, up ahead, a thud. He'd fallen?! I turned around the bend, freezing a foot before him, Luke. He was on the ground, holding onto his ankle. He must have tripped on the slippery ground, I felt that 'pang' in my chest and I clutched onto my shirt, right above my heart that felt so stabbed and wounded...All cause he rejected me. But...He was hopeless now. I could have my way. Dark thoughts began to form in my mind as I stared down at him, his eyes piercing me, those orbs of grey, almost threatening me. It was as if, without words, Luke was telling me to stay away, saying he'd hurt me if I dared try. But...I just have to grab onto his ankle, it was probably throbbing with pain at this moment. A sudden smirk. "Seems you're stuck Luke..." I whispered, hearing the distant drops of water as rain clouds suddenly poured in, blocking out the rest of the moonlight that the tree's branches had failed to do so. "You want help...Right?" Was I going to go through with this? Yes...I was. But half of me remained fixated on the spot, not wanting to move. 

One drop. 

Two drops. 

Downpour. 

The moon was gone, it was so dark, I could barely see him, but I could hear those whimpers of pain now and then, his heavy breathing from the long run. What thoughts were going through his mind now? Was he wondering as well why I wasn't going to help him? Though...He had probably already seen right through me, knowing I wanted something in return. To pay the price of caring for him. 

"What do you want?" He finally piped up, I smirked, staring down at his silhouette. Yet even though I had a pretty good idea, I didn't move. Unsure if I could face the responsibility of my actions. How horrible would I feel afterwards? So, my sweet side was the one that won in the end. I drew in a breath, the cool rain running down my back causing me to shudder and my voice to mess up a bit, "I...Want..." I paused, what did I want? I wanted to be loved. Why couldn't he just be like me?! And why was I being so horrible?! "Nothing." I finished, feeling this wave of disappointment wash through me. Had I really just done that? Chickened out... 

I stepped over towards Luke, I heard him shift, I felt something press against my leg. "Mark." He muttered, just barely audio able over the pouring of rain. What was it? Why couldn't I just carry him? I'd done it so many times. "Call someone...I don't want you to carry me back." I felt crushed as those words left his lips, I felt that pang yet again, a worse one then before. Was I going to cry some more? No. I wasn't a baby. No matter how much it hurt, I could bring myself to do it. I felt warmth on my face, 'Damn it!' I thought, I had cried. Why was he doing this,

"Why?" I asked, hearing my voice crack slightly, shaky as I tried to control those annoying tears, "Why can't I-?" 

"Because." He cut me off, for that!? Why was I listening anyway?! "You're lying when you say you don't want anything." He added a snarl to his words, dripping with the threats he was thinking behind them, "I don't like you!" 

Not even as a friend? I couldn't bring myself to ask that, fearing the answer. How could anyone be like this, all over a kiss, I didn't know. "It was just a kiss!" I snapped, shocked at myself, I stomped forward, right in front of him. 

"Just?! Are you serious?!" I leaned over, gripping onto the back of his head, feeling his wet hair between my fingers. I yanked his head back, hearing him gasp, and his hand pushing on me more. "Get away from me!" I snarled, who did he think he was?! I released his hair, getting my arm lower, bending over as I hooked my other arm under his leg, lifting him up. I walked; carrying him like a man would carry his wife and no matter how much he yelled and hit me I didn't put him down...I refused to. 

Eventually the yelling stopped, I was at his house, and he was asleep within my arms. I gave him to his mother, turning and leaving after that. He'd come to me. 

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It was a week after that incident. He's ignored me at school, all except today. I don't know what he was thinking. We were standing behind the main building, I was leaning up against one of the concrete pillars, and he was standing before me, staring at me with his bright eyes, that jet black hair pushed just a bit to the side. 

"What do you want?" I asked, he hadn't spoken with me ever since the 'incident', or so as he referred to it with his stupid friends...It pissed me off he told people, wasn't bad enough the crap I had going around. Really, he has no business with me and I didn't want to deal with him. I was angry and hurt, all cause I was rejected, it killed just standing here. 'I don't want you near me ever again' is what he'd probably say, 'I don't want to be your friend- 

"Kiss me." My thoughts were interrupted by those words. 

"What?" I asked, not believing what I was hearing, had to be wrong.

"Kiss me." It was repeated by those pale lips. Was he serious? Well...He was telling me to. Couldn't say no. Though, I had a feeling this was a sick joke. I leaned over, I didn't have to tilt his head up, and he did it himself. My lips met his; I didn't want it to be extreme. Suddenly, I was pushed back right into the concrete supporter, "What the-?!" 

Luke was crying, 'Huh?' 

"Luke are you-?" 

"What the hell are you doing Mark?!" 

"We saw the whole thing!" Voices rang out, girls. I turned to look over, they had a pink cellphone between their fingers, "You fag. How disgusting. How dare you try and force yourself on Luke!" They mused, I suddenly realized what they were doing, they'd taken a picture of when Luke had pushed me, making it seem like I was at fault. He'd stoop this low? 

"Everyone is going to know about it! Haha."The barbies giggled, I looked to my 'friend', he'd hurt me enough, did he really need to try and hurt me more? He was smirking at me, that dark glint in his eyes. This wouldn't affect me...couldn't care less. 

Weekend. 

Next week. I regretted going to school. Whispers behind my back, dirty looks, comments. Not like I wasn't used to being alone, but I had always had Luke... 

I was going to 'talk' with him later. 

At his house. 

I AM going through with this...