Falling hard.

Chap 19 (Who is it? Ashton or Luke?)

I should of known that Luke is
A man whore and I should of known not to date him! This is so stupid he would have sex with a girl after going out on a date with me. He is just
So ugh .That date was pointless. This is stupid I'm over thinking it all. Really it was stupid and now I'm over it! I mean I'm getting angry for no absolute reason. We were nothing

Calum was right this is a great place to think. I like the fact that there is a stream here. I can throw rocks and watch the water flow by. This amazing landscape is breath taking. From the water, to the trees it's just amazing. It clears the mind. Well helps. This whole time I have been here it has been drama. .

It's high school and everything but this school is too important to treat it like high school. I'm here to do something with my life. I have been to busy to even think about me. I need to find my self a gig and start my career. Honestly I haven't even been paying all that much attention to my grades. Or even class I have been to worried about Luke.

This sucks. I hope I don't get kicked out. I need to call my mom. Just to talk to her. I miss her.

"hello mommy" I say trying to hide the sadness of me crying.
"hi Aria. What's wrong?" how does she know me so well.
"why does something have to be wrong for me to call you"
"no honey it's just... Never mind how are you"
"I'm ok. I miss you I miss home. It's not like what I thought It was going to be like mom. I miss home so much" I start to cry. I mean I can't help it I'm only 17 I knew that me being alone wasn't going to last long.
"aria. I know it must be super hard
But you got to remember that this is to benfit you. This is a huge opportunity." I know shes right this is a huge oppertunity but I haven't been treating it like it is.

"I know mom. I know" I try to sniffly my cry's away.
" I miss you so much Aria it's unexplainable but we both know that this is what you want. But of you really want to come home I will buy you a ticket." shes such a great mom and I do miss her but I'm not going to leave here.
"no mom. Thanks though I love you so much I guess I just needed to hear your voice I feel so much better now."
"that's what I'm here for. I love you. But you should get some sleep. "
"ok bye love you so much mom thanks"
"bye" she says and hangs up. She does always know the right thing to say but I'm still kind of sad. I wipe away my tears.

I hear rocks shuffle behind me. I quickly turn around and see Calum sitting on the swing. "hi" he smiles. I hope he didn't just witness my break down. "hi" I say as I turn around to face the stream."did you hear all of that?" "yes. I wasn't snooping I just came here to think and I seen you sitting their and you were crying and then you called her before I could say something"

Oh so he wasn't snooping but he was at the same time. "oh". "can I ask
You something" calum ask walking over and sitting right beside me. "yes" I say throwing a rock in to the stream.

"well. Why? I mean why did you go to lunch with me? Was it just because or what I'm so confused?" he finally blurts after 3 minutes. Well this sucks I knew I was goin to have this awkward conversation with him. "Calum it was just because I didn't expect it to turn into anything. Honestly I was just going to hang out as friends"

"Friends. Is that all we are. I need to know so I'm not wasting time on nothing." he says. Ouch that hurt a lot. Why does everyone call me nothing. Am I really nothing? " oh sorry I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that. Like... If your not into me like that just tell me. We can still be friends" he smiles and runs his hand on the small of my back.

"no calum I dont like you like that. I'm sorry" I tell him "it's fine I under stand. Who is it? Ashton or Luke?". "well neither. I'm not looking for anything at the moment. I'm trying to focus on my self and my career." i sigh and stand up. Dusting my pants calum joins me. But it might just be luke."I understand and you should do that. It was hard to get in here. It's sad that your thinking about going home" he tells me as I walk to the swing leaning my head against it. "yes I know but all this stuff with the guys has distracted me." "that just sucks" he tells me. Its getting real dark out here. It's also 10:30 pm.

"would you like me to walk you back to your dorm" he sweetly asks me. I shake my head and we start walking. "well are you still going to hang out
With us?" well honestly I don't want to But I wont tell anyone tell after the gig tomorrow. "I dont know" I bluntly state. "well you can't miss the gig tomorrow"

"I know i know." I smile we walk across the campus. This place feels so much bigger just because there is this awkward quietness between Calum and i. "we should hang out again just us." I tell him as we reach the doors to my dorm. "yes we should" he smiles and walks away. That was so awkward. He didn't say much. wow I'm being over dramatic about things. It's not that serious. I need to get over it. Over liking luke.

LUKE'S P.O.V

"oh Luke. Oh Luke.... come on just". "shit Suzy your so fucking annoying. Just get the fuck out!" I yell at a half naked Suzy standing in my room. I just don't want to have sex. Not now
And not with her I'm just not feeling it. "get out!" I yell and shove her
Out of my room.

"fine! Shit next time you despritlly need a fucking blow job don't call me!" she yells before slamming my door. Shit took her long enough. She
Was standing their for a good 20 minutes. I was trying to sleep for work but she wants to come banging on the door for sex. When I told her no she should of just taken it and left.

Well shit now the bitch put me in a bad mood and now I can't sleep it off! I'm stuck going to work In a pissed off mood! I hate when this happens then I have to greet people. This sucks! "aha. What was that about Suzy stormed out the door all pissed off" Ashton asked walking in the room. Now I have to deal with his anoying ass.

"nothing" I grumbled. "ok nothing. Was it not good?" he sarcastically asks. Sometimes he is just so annoying. "no. I didn't even fuck her. So mind your own god damn business" I yell as I sit up on my bed. I'm not going to get any sleep at all now that he is home. "liar, Aria and I heard you". What did he just say Aria? What the hell were they doing together again. I though she hated him.

"what?". "well aria and I came up here to get her paper or some shit and we heard he saying oh Luke oh Luke" he says in a fake girl voice. "nah I didn't even fuck her she was winning like a fucking baby because I didnt want sex. What did aria do." oh crap she must have been so pissed. Aha wow. "she ran off. Why? Does someone have a crush" he laughed.

"shit no. But she's mine for the list so stay away!" I warn him. I get up from my bed and walk closer to him tell we're face to face. "seriously. Mine!". He laughs and pushes me away. That fuck face. "nah bro shes all call. You can't have her of she doesn't want you". I go and push him back he falls on his bed. "Don't fucking shove me again ass! And she does want me. We have made out twice. I don't care if she is all call she is mine" I walk over and slide in my work shirt.

I can't believe that he is going to fight over another girl. I win every time so he might as well give up. "bro give me a day she will be all over me by tomorrow". "fine get her to make out with you tomorrow then she is all call. But trust me she will be in my list. Not yours.". "what ever dude she's just for the List don't get all to attached. You know what happen to Michael" he jokes.

The feeling that I get knowing Michael used my sister for the list just pisses me the fuck off. He is so lucky he fell in love with her because if he just used her I would of had to kill him. "shit no Ash I don fall for the list girls. I have to go bye" I tell him as I leave my dorm and go to my car. So this list. I know that it's bad but we have been doing it for almost two years now.

------ flash back shoph year-----

"hey" Ashton says walking into our new band mate Calums house. "late agin!" Michael out new manger says. "sorry mums Michael" Ashton mocks him. "sit!" he yells. We all do so and sit in a circle. "first official band meeting" he says. "well we need a name first" I snobby remark. We kind of just made this band 3 days ago. We all had English and special band together. No we're not special.

Anyways we all figured out that we're super funny and talented so why not start a hot band! "the five men" calum finally says. "no we're not 5 men were 4 and I'm pretty sure ashton isn't a man" I joke. Ashton tosses his water bottle at me. "big start" Michael says. We all shake our head and calum gags.

"eat men" Ashton suggested. "no. How about 5 seconds of" I began to say before Michael says "summer". I shake my head. We all look around then I say "5 seconds of summer?". "yes!!! That works" Ashton smiles. We all sit there and take in the fact that we now have a band name 5sos.

"want to play a game all years of high school?" Ashton asks and we all look at him in confusion. Not knowing what he is talking about at all.