Author By Chance

Nineteen; The world is full of love, couples and Éponines

Hey Wattpad, first off, I had exams on this week and so I was studying for those lols. Anyways, here's your update.
-G x

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Katherine's POV:

It was the French Revolution and I lay on the ground with a relentlessly bleeding wound on top of... Marius. I knew that I was going to die but all the while my final wish was answered, I was dying in the arms of the one whom I loved. Although it was nothing like the film, Le Miserables, it was more so cold, intense and raw, and I wasn't with the one that I loved. I was alone and crying, with an open wound that kept searing my bones and sending me constantly over the edge.

I was Éponine and I was dying. Dying in the sense that not only did I lose a friend but I also lost the one whom I loved dearly.

The time after Ian said that we shouldn't be friends anymore took a toll on me. At first it didn't hit me, I just cried, but as the hours went on I realised that it was all over. He was gone. I was gone. Love broke me and everyone could see it.

Insanely in my head I thought that maybe if I had told him 3 years ago that I loved him that everything will be different. However, life isn't like that and maybe Ian was right, maybe the fact that fate combined us together as a pairing at the wrong time was all part of a plan. Maybe, I was just kidding myself to think that I could feel love and be loved in any way by someone whom I was close with. I guess, in my head I hyped up what I would think would happen between us.

Maybe, I should just let out all of the emotions that I'm currently succumb to.

The empty screen of my Google Document was soon filled with words. Words that I genuinely felt right in this moment. My heart was burning viciously and furiously as I finally finished my book about Ian. Sighing I wipe away my straying tears and place my laptop back onto my desk. It was done. I was done. But in a weird sort of way I felt at peace and content with myself. It is as if formulating my feelings out in a Google Document helped me keep my sanity in tact.

That night I couldn't get to sleep. I was scared of my mind... it was just... all too consuming. I tried to write out my feelings in a Google Document but I, of all people should know that I will never be freed from these ever consuming emotions and words. It is all an endless and relentless cycle of me being trapped and consumed by the meaningless nothingness of the dark abyss.

A almost silent knock at my door makes me pull myself back to reality, even though nowadays I have lost my grip on reality and fantasy. The tall male figure walks through the door, this time it wasn't Lincoln. I take notice that he doesn't know how to approach me as I lay on my bed in utter and total silence. I had been silent for so long on the topic of Ian that it seemed right for me to start the conversation with my father.

"Dad, why does the people we love the most end up hurting us?"

"... Because, the concept of love is different for everyone. We all want, admire and try to find the concept of love but only some will get it. It takes a brave person to be able to express their love for another. And so, to answer your question about why the people we love the most end up hurting us... well because that is how love works. Some people just uncontrollably fall for the ones who don't love them back. Love isn't just a silly little concept that we as humans just throw around willy nilly. It is a painful concept that only some will grow to find."

"But, why do we have to fall in love with people? Isn't there people out there who fall in love with abstract things?"

"Yes, pumpkin, there are people out there who have found the concept of love, through words, through music, through films, through nature, through the arts. It seems complicated to understand right now but with time you will understand the beautiful and tragic concept of love."