CAPTAIN | c.evans [1] ✓

twenty five.

group chat.

THE GUYS (MEN)
[ 6 participants ]

DORITO EVANS;
So...

RUTHLESS STAN;
What?

ANNOYING MACKIE;
Please tell me this about you and Carmen.

OLD RDJ;
I'm telling you.
Chrismen is going to rise anyway.

DORITO EVANS;
Yeah.
I kinda told her I had feelings for her.

GODLY HEMSWORTH;
Who is this that you speak of?

OLD RDJ;
Okay, Thor.
Be your Chrissy self— not your character.

GODLY HEMSWORTH;
Why are you always salty?
You're saltier than the ocean, my friend.

DORITO EVANS;
Her name is Carmen.
She's a veterinarian that I sorta met over twitter.

RUTHLESS STAN;
Meaning he hasn't actually met her yet.

ARCHER RENNER;
I found her on twitter, and she's actually really nice.

GODLY HEMSWORTH;
I hate suggesting it.
But how do you know it's not a catfisher?

DORITO EVANS;
A "catfisher"?

GODLY HEMSWORTH;
Someone who isn't what they say and talk to someone over the internet.

DORITO EVANS;
Oh.
Then I know it's not a catfisher.
I've talked to her, and heard her voice.

RUTHLESS STAN;
I've googled her too.
She's more than real.

ANNOYING MACKIE;
But what's with the princess thing?

OLD RDJ;
And the captain?

ARCHER RENNER;
Oh? 😳😳

DORITO EVANS;
It's not even like that, Jeremy.
I called her babe jokingly, and she said don't call her that. Then, I said fine, and called her princess. It's nothing too serious.
And she just stared calling me captain.
I mean, I play Captain America for heavens sake.

GODLY HEMSWORTH;
Man.
You miss one movie, and you miss a lot.

OLD RDJ;
Iron Man doesn't miss a thing. 💪🏻

RUTHLESS STAN;
Except for Howard and Maria.

DORITO EVANS;
D—mn. That was low. 😂😂😂

OLD RDJ;
THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR!

ANNOYING MACKIE;
And I'm the immature one?

RUTHLESS STAN;
Mackie, yeah.
You're the one who acted like a middle schooler and asked Carmen if she was pregnant after saying positive.

GODLY HEMSWORTH;
Don't ever ask a woman if she's pregnant.
She'll probably tear you up.

ANNOYING MACKIE;
I ain't scared of Carmen.
She's too sweet.

DORITO EVANS;
She is, but she's strong dude.
I wouldn't test her.

RUTHLESS STAN;
So far, sounds like you've got a keeper.
Just— are you gonna keep her?

DORITO EVANS;
Look— I just confessed my feelings in a nerve wracking way. Can we take one step at a time?
Besides, we may not even get to a "relationship" stage.

OLD RDJ;
That was the saddest thing I've ever read.
Honestly.

GODLY HEMSWORTH;
You need to go and ask that woman on a date.
Now, Evans.

DORITO EVANS;
And I would, but...
She lives in Nebraska, and I wouldn't want to ask her out over text. It's not classy.

RUTHLESS STAN;
He's too much like Steve Rogers.
He's to gentlemanly, and classy.

DORITO EVANS;
You know what, Stan.
I don't wanna hear it.
She's a lady, and she deserves better.

OLD RDJ;
💁🏻💅🏻
He told you.

RUTHLESS STAN;
Stfu downey.

OLD RDJ;
Fight me.

DORITO EVANS;
This is why we had a civil war.

GODLY HEMSWORTH;
If I do recall, it was because of Stark and Rogers. Not because of Bucky.

OLD RDJ;
What do you know, you overrated God.
You weren't even invited to the war.
Bye boi.

ARCHER RENNER;
And RDJ is more hip than all the kids.

DORITO EVANS;
You're all hot messes...

RUTHLESS STAN;
Stfu chris.

OLD RDJ;
Stfu chris.

GODLY HEMSWORTH;
Stfu chris.

ARCHER RENNER;
Stfu chris.

ANNOYING MACKIE;
Stfu chris.

DORITO EVANS;
Well. D—mn, okay.

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