Rising Dragons

Fáelán

Character Ramble - Just finished this!!!

Fáelán states that his story starts when he's young – seven, maybe six. Aldrys (always) argues that Fáelán's story starts when he's born because that's his beginning. Fáelán doesn't agree, but he knows that Aldrys has never understood the impact he's had on Fáelán, on how he Fáelán grew because of him.

Fáelán is young, short, black-haired, brown-eyed, and all too malleable, all too emotional, all too kind. He's short limbs and wide-eyes and uncertain (unsure, scared, confused, young). He's the child of a noble, and despite how much he tries (and he tries so, so hard; he does his best, but it isn't enough – it would never be enough) to be perfect, to be flawless, he can't. He fails and fails, and always, always fails and that never changes. He's the son of nobles and the younger sibling, always second to his perfect, perfect sister (who's flawless, who could never fail, could never be anything less than faultless). He wants to live up to his family's standards, their expectations, and he tries but it doesn't work. It doesn't work.

Fáelán's young enough to sneak out, young enough to avoid detection, but old enough to go missing for a few hours and go unnoticed. So Fáelán takes to the forest, hiding himself among wide, brown trunks and green leaves of bushes. He doesn't think he'll be found (he doesn't count on Aldrys; he never does). With a gritted jaw and despairing thoughts, Fáelán tries to understand why his trying ends up scarring him; giving him blemishes. He needs to be perfect, wants to perfect – it's all he's ever wanted (it's all he's ever needed to know).

Aldrys finds him when he doesn't want to be found, and Fáelán stares at this wild elf with hazel eyes that contain a fearsome glint. He understands why there are wary whispers of this wild thing that roams the forests.

Fáelán feels the need to explain himself, why he has a reason to intrude upon this wild one's territory. His fingers rub over the newly formed scar, raised skin feeling unnatural beneath his fingertips. Aldrys catches the movement, and somehow manages to understand Fáelán's thoughts.

"We are what we are, and we shouldn't let anyone tell us what we can't be. We shouldn't let the shadows we stand in define us."

Fáelán looks, wide-eyed and young and kind and soft. Confused and worried and all too scared, yet he stares at this wild elf, this wild thing, and he sees beyond the danger and gleam of a predator. He looks and sees something lonely and wild and far too strange to ever be fully understood by the elves.

(If Aldrys looked at Fáelán and saw someone far too soft, too kind, yet willing to try, then Fáelán looked at Aldrys and saw someone far too wild, too strong, and too big to be contained, yet willing to reach out).

Fáelán has always been quiet, been soft, been kind, been passive. It's all he's known, all he's ever needed to be – it's always been his attempt to replicate perfection (it's always failed). However, Fáelán (unnoticed Fáelán, soft Fáelán, imperfect Fáelán, silent Fáelán) has always held a heart stronger than most in his chest. Something that carries daggers yet no shield and wears no armour (he is willing to hurt both himself and others in an attempt to stop what he believes is more pain). Fáelán's never had a reason to strike out, to speak up, to make his opinion known.

(Kid, we all need to speak up because we deserve to have our opinions heard; it matters.)

At the age of ten, like many others, Fáelán starts his weapon training. Here, Aldrys learns to use steel for claws and use a weapon-edge to draw blood. Here, Fáelán learns to stand with heels planted in the ground and call upon his magic. (Here, they both learn what it means to fight with someone at your back, with a friend, with a partner – here, they learn what bound-by-battle means).