Lost Stars

Chapter Fifty

-Athena's POV-

"Things are changing," Jason said, sitting down and meeting my eyes, "I think the end is near."

I sighed. "So, what's the end game? You never really told me," I leaned back on the couch, completely ignoring the football game that I had put on, "You told me about how we were going to clean up the city the way that it needed to be. I know that. And we've been doing that. I also feel that things are starting to get more serious. So, I'm curious what your plan of action is." I tugged at the fabric of my pajama pants, not really wanting to hear Jason's answer. Of course, he still gave it to me with no reluctancy.

"I will kill the Joker. That is the last thing I will do." Jason set his jaw. He looked tired and stressed. Our restocking mission had left us both in shambles after Black Mask's assassins followed us all the way to Russia. We had managed to defeat the original assassins, but some Russians were paid off and forced us to retreat. We only managed to restock our ammo, but couldn't smuggle out any new or more powerful guns. 

"And when that's over? Bruce and Jason and probably even Tim will chase us and try to put us both in Arkham," I said. I swallowed loud. 

"Listen, babe," the pet name took me by surprise, but I let it slide, "It's gonna end in two ways: Joker will die or I will."

The casual way Jason tossed around his death made me shiver. I know he had died before -- I had seen him at the League of Assassins temple even -- but we never really discussed it. Jason and I had swapped stories about our fucked up pasts while cracking relatable jokes and we had told each other what the other had been through. But, I had never gone in depth with him about my past and neither did he. He never described how his death had effected him, but I could see it. Anytime I brought up Bruce, he would cringe or avoid the subject. Tim was also a subject he actively refused to talk about. 

He would throw around the fact that he died, but I never heard the story of how it happened or how he ended up with Thalia or any of that. Jason and I just weren't like that; we never opened up to each other. That wasn't a bad thing, but it was just so different from Dick and I's whole dynamic. 

I didn't want Dick over Jason, nor did I think our relationship was better, it was just different. And a part of me missed that difference. The difference between Dick and Jason is exactly what made the relationships so different. Where Dick was soft and caring, Jason was hot and passionate. Jason and I burned bright and hard. Dick and I were more slow and warm. The difference was also how we each came together. Dick and I had crushes on each other and then fell in love hard. Jason and I were full of lust from the beginning and then got together. I love them both, but Jason made me feel excited. Sure, it might just be a fling, but I didn't care. 

Being with Jason made me feel wild like an animal. Being with Jason made me forget about how much I loved Dick. Jason and I were so passionate to each other because of how much alike we were. Jason and I were both angry at the world. And while Jason was super sarcastic, he was also very intense. Dick was more positive and easy going. That's the reasons I could never really stop loving him, no matter how much I tried. I couldn't forget that feeling of being content with the world -- a feeling I never really felt before or could feel all on my own -- and I missed it. 

People say how "two wrongs won't make a right." A part of me knew that when Jason and I started dating, but I didn't care. I was determined to let myself fall in love with Jason. Some say that when you break up with the one you thought was your soulmate, you are destined to date carbon copies of "the one that got away." But not Jason. Jason was Dick's polar opposite. And I loved it.

I let my eyes wander over Jason, taking in his form. I wanted to reach out and smooth out all the tenseness in his shoulders. "And after Joker's dead?" I asked, my voice rising in pitch. I had a bad feeling. I couldn't lose Jason. Not after what happened with Dick.