Red Lips & Brown Eyes // Jack Barakat

Red Lips & Brown Eyes ~ Chapter Eighteen: I'm A Wreck

Song: Say Something by A Great Big World 

Day Twenty-Six 

Jack's Pov 

Douche bag, douche bag, douche bag. The words continued to repeat in my mind as I pushed passed the crowd of people at the airport. My heart literally drops once I spot the familiar petite girl with the pixie cut walking around the airport like a lost puppy. I want to feel happy to see Erica again, but I just can't bring myself to do so. 

"Erica!" I shouted, earning unwanted attention from strangers. I ignore them as I walked to my girlfriend with opened arms. 

"Jack!" She squealed happily. God, her voice was already beginning to annoy me. I felt a little guilty that she was excited to see me while I was already starting to count down the days until she left. Erica would be with us on this tour until we reached Washington where she had to do some art show gallery thing. I don't know exactly what it is she was rambling over the phone about. Mainly because my thoughts were preoccupied by a brunette with red lips and how I managed to screw over my relationship with her completely. 

Erica grabbed my hand and I started toward the exit of the airport. I found the blue rental car and shoved Erica's bags into the trunk of the car. While driving back to the venue, Erica made countless -and pointless- attempts to start a conversation with me. I quickly ended her attempts on pointless chatter over irrelevant topics by turning up the music playing through the stereo speakers. 

When we arrived at the venue, Erica quickly got out of the car and hurried toward the All Time Low bus. I sighed and pulled the keys out of the ignition. I didn't yet want to spend time with my girlfriend so I decided to sit in the rental car for a few more minutes. 

How fucked up is that- I'd rather sit in a tiny car listening to bad rap music instead of spending time with my 'girlfriend', if you can even call us that. I don't view Erica as a girlfriend anymore. More so, I envision her as a pestering woman who lives in my apartment, calls me every other week and expects so much from me. 

Maybe this is why we'll never work, she expects too much. When we dated a few years back, things were great. Fuck, I even thought Erica would be the girl I'd end up marrying. I'm not exactly sure when things took a turn for the worse, or if she even notices a change in out relationship, but I'm tired of it. I'm sick and tired of spending time with her. She's a cool girl, but only when she wants to be. 

Why should I spend time with someone who annoys me more than makes me happy? She was the first girl I ever loved, I'm not going to lie. But that love that I once felt is no longer present. The fire that she used to ignite has burnt out and turned to ashes. Those ashes has been swept away and that fire has been replaced. 

I closed my eyes and leaned my hand against the seat. Visions of red lips flashed in my mind and I couldn't help the smile that grew on my lips. Melissa is so much more different than Erica. Melissa's short, really short, and curvy. Erica's tall and extremely skinny. I don't think she has an eating disorder, but you never know. I just hope she doesn't because she's too good for that. 

Melissa... She's different. She ignites the fire that's been burnt out for months- maybe years. When she touches me, I feel like I'm going to lose it. She drives me crazy sometimes, but she also makes me happy and alive. She makes me want to see the world more and she... She just makes me feel happy again. She doesn't make me feel trapped or suffocated with constant bickering of buying a wedding ring, or getting a 'real job'. I find it funny how Erica doesn't think that playing in a band is a 'real job'. Frankly, I don't give a fuck what she thinks anymore. 

The only person I really care about is Melissa Hoppus. 

Well I also care about my parents and band-mates, but that's not the point. 

The point is that I had a chance to be with the most wonderful girl in the world, and I blew it. I blew my chance with Melissa, I rejected her and acted like some egoistic cunt, and why? 

Because I'm scared. I'm scared of starting something with her because I don't want my relationship with her to end up like 'Jerica' did. Erica makes me miserable, but she once made me the happiest man in the world. I resent her now, but I don't want to end up resenting Melissa too. 

Tapping on the window pulled me out of my thoughts. I opened my eyes, relieved to see that it was just Alex. I opened the window and stepped out of the car. Alex looked curious, but concerned. I could see the emotion hiding behind his brown eyes. He was trying to play it off with a smile, but I've known him since seventh grade and I know when he's trying to hide something. 

"Erica's waiting for you, dude." He said, his hands buried into the pockets of his American pants. I nodded and started toward the bus, but Alex stopped me by grabbing a hold of my wrist. I turned around and cocked an eyebrow at him. "Forget Erica and get in the damn car, Jack. We need to talk." His demeanor changed and I could hear the harsh edge in his voice. 

Hesitantly, I walked toward the car and sat in the driver's side. Alex slid into the passenger's side and glared at me for a few seconds before he said, "You're an asshole, Jack Barakat." 

"What?" I looked at him, confused, "How am I an asshole?" 

"Well, let's begin with the fact that you broke Melissa's heart and haven't talked to her since. Mark wants to kill you, but I think you already know that. To add insult to injury, you brought your annoying fucking girlfriend here. Did you ever consider Melissa's feelings? Did her reaction to seeing the reason why you rejected her ever cross your mind?" He asked. 

My jaw clenched and I gripped on the steering wheel. "I didn't mean to break her heart, but what was I supposed to do? Break up with Erica and get together with Melissa?" 

"Yes!" Cried Alex, his hands tugging at his hair. "That's exactly what you were supposed to do, you idiot! I don't think you understand how heart broken Melissa was, do you?" I stayed quiet, not knowing how to answer his question. 

"She cried so much," he said, his voice quiet, "she cried more than you will ever know." 

"Shut up, Alex." I muttered. The thought of Melissa crying over me made my heart shatter in a million pieces. It's crazy how hard I fell for this girl in less than a fucking month. 

"She kept calling you a jackass and Tyler had to hold her for hours until she stopped crying." The thought of Tyler holding Melissa and comforting her makes me rage with jealousy. I should have been the one comforting that beautiful girl- I should have been the one. 

"Shut the fuck up!" I shouted, my fists slammed against the surface of the steering wheel. Alex didn't flinch, but he stopped with the torture. I sighed, regret taking over me completely. "What am I going to do Alex?" I quietly asked, feeling absolutely hopeless. How is it that this girl can infatuate me so much? Leaning forward, I pressed my forehead against the steering wheel.  

Alex placed his hand on my back, a poor attempt and useless try to comfort me. "There's only one thing you can do, Jack." He said. For the millionth time in the past ten minutes, I sighed. "You have to end it with Erica, she's no good for you."  

I shook my head and sat up, my hand pushed through my hair. "I can't just dump her," I said. As much as I resent her, I would feel too bad if I just walked up to her and said, "Hey, you're a bitch and I can't take it anymore". I've been with her for years, I can't just drop her. 

"Yes, you can." Alex said. "She makes you miserable, Jack. I can see it in your eyes. Whenever she's around, they're dull. When you're with Melissa, they're filled with life. I hate seeing my best-friend like this."  

I stayed quiet, my gaze fixed on the outside of the window. Alex sighed beside me, but I didn't look at him. "I'm going," he said and opened the door, "but remember, Jack; if you don't do something about Melissa now, she will move on and you'll lose your chance with the only girl who has made you happy in a long time." 

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What do you guys think will happen next? :O What do you think Jack will do? 

Also, I have a new Oli Sykes story up if you guys like Oliver Sykes :3 I will try my best to update this story quicker ~Mae