When i first met her she brought joy to my life. She gave me a reason to live. For 3 weeks everything was perfect. I actually thought she was my dream girl but I knew there would be consequences. I knew something would go wrong but it was a matter of time.... Right before our one month anniversary I realized that something went wrong. We started to drift apart, the bright light shining through that darkness that had brought me back to the right path is gone. I don't know where i'm going to go from here but I do know this, It's not gonna be filled with joy and love. Without her I can't do much, I thought this was the right choice to make but i now know i'm a disgrace. I'm falling in this never ending cycle, it goes, find something to be happy about, stay happy, fuck that up be sad, fuck up more things, I start to regret life, hurt someone I care about become depressed, Mess up everything else and hit rock bottom with depression worse than the great depression. Then below that is where I am. I don't know how to fix this, I don't know if anyone can fix me, Hell I don't even know if I want to be fixed. I mean whats the point? I'll be happy for a short period of time until the process repeats over again.
