Games Of Destiny

chapter twenty four

I was stunned, I know its not the first time we've kissed but now it's different, he is a king. He deserves the best, he needs someone more of his standards and I'm not any of that, I know that what I feel for him is real but it's something that scares me too. I've never felt like this for anyone before, sometimes its as if I've been in love before. I not remembering my past complicated the issue more, its something that I would love to find out about. No matter how hard I try my past will always reflect my future and how can I move on if I still don't know myself?
All this thoughts made me want pull away from the kiss but he wouldn't let me go. I tried again but to avail, I tried one more time and I guess he noticed what I was trying to do, so he let me go.

" what's wrong? " he asked, I know that he was staring at me, I on the other hand didn't look at him, I couldn't but I spoke nonetheless.

" its nothing! It's just that I don't think that we're doing the right thing" I said hoping that he gets my point.

" meaning? " he asked looking a bit angry, how will I say this so that he won't get angry? now I think I need a 'good luck'

" what I mean to say is that you and I are can't happen, we are both from different worlds, I mean you are a king and I'm no one, I believe you deserve better cause I'm not worthy of you" I finished looking at him, his body got tensed, his fists were clenched, I noticed that his eyes were dark too. Oh what did I just do? This are the moment I wished I was dreaming right now.

" and who told you that you are not worthy?" He asked, raising his voice, all I wanted to do right now is to run away, I hate it when people ask me things related to my past, it's something I don't remember so how can I answer them? The thought of my past made my eyes water. Looks like he noticed that I was going to cry, he wanted to embrace me but I stepped back and put my hands up for him to stop, which he did.

" I'm sorry but you and I just can't happen, I think we should just let faith decide, I have a dark past that keep pulling me back and till I find the answers I don't think that I can really move forward, I'm sorry" I said, and turned to leave just then I remembered something and turned to face him again.

" and please can I ask you for something? " a asked him and he nodded, wow Ariana! You have a lot of guts to ask him for something after you turned him down, I mentally thought.

" what is it?" He asked

" um.. will you..please don't fire the servants and guards.. please?" I begged him looking really innocent by giving him my best puppy dog eyes. He stared at me for a long time, this time I stared back at him, I noticed that he was doing his best not to get angry.

" you may leave now Ariana!" He ordered and turned to look at his now cold coffee and then he left to the adjoined room. Wait that's it? No reply? Yeah right like like I own him. Why did I even ask him that? Thank goodness he didn't throw me out of the palace, I really should know my place, I sighed and left the room.

............................

"Your Majesty" a young woman to whom I suppose is lady kaila, as the other servant mentioned earlier. That have been making arrangements for her arrival, she greeted the queen and bowed to her too. I must admit that is very beautiful, she had long wavy blonde hair which fell on her shoulders and fair spotless skin, she also had pouted lips which was covered with red lipstick and high cheekbone. Her big blue eyes were edible, matching her blue gown perfectly, the gown was too revealing to my liking. It was a strapless gown, in which the hem of the gown was just above her knee.