Forever Holding On

Chapter 11

I wake up with his name on my tongue.

"Allen."

Somehow, I had managed to cry myself to sleep in the middle of the forest. The sun was just about to set, great, it was the evening. I had to get back to the others, and fast. I didn't care how much Lavi hated me at this point, I had to find them. I pull myself up, dusting off the twigs and leaves from myself. Luckily I remembered which way I came from, I started down the pathway again and made my way out of the forest.

"Guys?!" My voice escaped my throat as I called, the blades of grass were covered with water, it was only missed. It tickled my ankles as I stepped through it. I look around desperately, trying to find them. When I see the train tracks, my heart stops beating. The train, wasn't here. My legs give out, I fall to my knees in the field, I didn't think about anything at that point in time.

The wind was slowly picking up, it cut my hair into strips, it blew through the cool breeze. "No..." I whisper. "This can't be happening." I squeak suddenly, I put my face in my hands, I try to cry. Nothing. No, I can't cry right now, not at this time. I had to get up, walk, go find them. Even if Lavi hates me right now, I don't care. I had to find them all.

Even Allen.

I raise my face from my hands. Yes, the train left without me. I don't care at this point, I had to be strong now, this is not what I wanted. I will get my revenge, on the Noah. I will find them, my friends, my brother. As I slowly raise from sitting on the grass, I watch as dark gray clouds rolled in slowly as the sunset was covered by the darkness. It was about to rain. I trail toward the tracks of the train, and started to follow them.

I prayed to myself that it wouldn't storm out, that was one of my hugest fears as a child and it still is. I look at my feet as I reminisce to myself, about seven years ago.

~Flashback~

Thunder roared through the house as rain smacked the roof loudly. I screamed and shoot up from my bed, covering my ears. A bright streak of lighting could be seen out my window, I grab my small blanket and squeeze it tightly. I could feel the sting of salty tears in my eyes, I needed him. I needed my brother.

"Lavi! Lavi come here please!" I yelled before another crack of thunder shot through the house again. This time, I fell off my bed, I squeak again and hug the bedpost tightly. Before I knew it, my door swung open, and my twelve year old brother stood there. "Ivory, you okay?!" Lavi rushed to my side instantly. I could feel goosebumps grow on my bare arms and I shook my head.

"The storm...." My voice cracks as I hug the bedpost tighter when I saw lighting. Lavi sat next to me and held my arms. "Let go...." He said calmly. I shook my head, not wanting to let go. "Ivory, trust me...just let go." He said still calm. I shivered as I slowly released my grip, Lavi held my wrists and he pulled me into his big strong arms. I hugged my brother tightly, gripping my fingers in his nightshirt. He rubbed small circles in my back. "It's alright Ivory, I'm here..."

He stands, still holding me. He sits on my bed and looks out the window, it felt like I could fall asleep right there. "L-Lavi...don't go, c-can you please stay here." I stammer, pulling my head back slightly. Lavi rubbed his eyes and yawned, clearly tired, but he looked at me and smiled warmly. "Sure." He said. He lays down with me beside him, another crack of thunder was heard. I gasp and cover my face. Lavi rolls on his side, he put the blanket over me and hugged me. "Just relax Ivory, try to go back to sleep okay..." He looks at me. I look back up at him, removing my hands. I nod slowly. "T-Thank you big brother." I mumbled putting my head on the pillow. Lavi nods and lays on his back again. I blink one more time. "Goodnight, I love you brother." I hold his arm for protection. Lavi's eyes opened and he looked at me. He smirks a bit. "Love you too little sis..." He says as we both drift into a sleep.

~End~

The rain starts to fall, like a nice cool shower, my hair dampens as the water hit my skin and hair. My lips were quivering, tears had been streaming down my face, but the rain washed them away. I still prayed to myself that there was no thunder, only rain. It started to get cold, luckily my jacket was keeping me warm, I felt like I didn't deserve to wear it. I squeeze my eyes shut and shook my head, a growl escaping my mouth as I walked faster down the tracks, not knowing where they were leading to.

New thoughts came into my head. I was predicting what was going to happen when I found everyone again, if I found them. Lavi could regret what he called me, but he also could not. Lavina could want nothing to do with me, and Allen. Allen, something clicked into my head about him. I tried to find a way not to like him, try to remember anything bad about him, but I couldn't. There was one little thing about Allen that, just made me want to be calm. I don't know what it could be.

As I trailed onto a bridge, I look over the edge, it was a long way down to a swirling river. I had to be very very cautious, I could be killed. I stop in my tracks, becoming light headed, I take a deep breathe and kneel down. I put my hand on the metal track, no vibration, no train coming. I learned this technique from my master before becoming an exorcist. I stand back up again, take a deep breathe, and start walking carefully. I didn't bother looking over the edge of the bridge, it would terrify me so much that I would just stay here frozen in place.

I stay in the middle of the tracks and I look forward, more thoughts coming to mind. Again, about Allen. I could see his face in the back of my eyes, his white hair almost resting over his eyes, his greyish-blue eyes looking at mine, I didn't care about his curse mark on his eye, it was what made him, him. How polite he was to me even after the accident with the food tray, I regret the harsh attitude I had toward him. I regret it so much, my stomach flutters when I hear him talking to me in my head. I cringe a little and shook my head, stop. I can't be doing this, I can't have this feeling.

I was so distracted in my thoughts, I didn't see where I was going, I gasp and trip over the track. I regained my balance by hanging onto the railing, it was low, so I almost fell over. My heartbeat was escalating quickly and I hold my hand to my chest. I heave a sigh as I go to turn around, I look to see a hooded figure standing across from me, and before I could study it.

Boom.

Thunder roared through the sky, loudly. My eyes widened and I screamed, stumbling back, my back hit the railing, but my upper body had already gone over the railing. My whole body had fell over the railing, I went to grab it with my hand, but I failed. I started falling. Air filled my lungs do I couldn't scream, I squeeze my eyes shut preparing myself for my death. Suddenly, the crack of what sounded like a whip wrapped around my wrist, I swooped under the bridge. Screaming, I held onto the rope tightly, I was flung back above the bridge where I grabbed the railing and squeezed it tightly. It was wet, so it was very slippery, chills shot through me as I held onto dear life.

"You are such an idiot."

A deep and dark voice said darkly at me, my eyes shot open as I was pulled over the railing. Suddenly, fear struck me into my heart like an arrow. That voice, that obvious and scary voice. It was scary to see him, alive, after four years of training with him. I hiss a little as I glare at the hooded figure, then, he pulled down his hood, exposing himself to me. It was him.

General Cross Marian. My master.