Taking Chances

Chapter 11

Bec sat in the passenger seat of Ryan's F-150. They were stopped outside Jen's flat and the side of her face tingled with heat from Phil's slap. She refused to touch it as if that would deny Phil the results of the pain.

The world appeared grey and cold to Bec. The lack of rain had left the median strip brown and cracked. Why did she notice this now? It's not like the grass shrivelled and died over night. The trees, too. She noticed them sway with cold winter wind as if they were grasping at the last drops of moisture carried by the air.

"You want some help to get out?"

Ryan's voice brought her back to the human world. She shook her head and reached for the door handle. Her hands shook.

"I'll walk you to the door," said Ryan.

"No. You've done enough." Bec's voice sounded flat and empty. She didn't look at Ryan as she got out of the vehicle.

Ryan interpreted Bec's distance as anger, or disappointment. He cursed himself for not getting involved sooner. He should have done something as soon as that asshole grabbed her, but the suddenness of it had taken Ryan by surprise, like when you see something for the first time and your brain needs a moment to catch up with your eyes. Ryan promised himself he would not fall short next time.

Bec got out of Ryan's old F-150, slammed the door, and went inside Jen's flat without looking back. Ryan waited for a few minutes, then drove home.

Inside the apartment, Jen brewed camomile tea while Bec sat on the sofa, tears streaming down her face. "I was stupid enough to think he'd just bring my things and let me go. I'm such an idiot!"

"He's the idiot, Rebecca. Not you. He's the abuser. You can't think you're anything less because of him."

The tea brewed, Jen brought two steaming cups over to Bec and sat down next to her on the sofa. It was good to have a sister like Jen, who simply listened as Bec sobbed and talked in a swirling mess for what seemed like hours but was really only fifteen minutes.

Bec felt drained, as if her emotions were the last hints of moisture evaporating from barren soil. But with those emotions went her attachment to Phil, and somewhere deep inside, Bec knew that soon she would be ready to truly move on.

Nursing the cup of tea in both hands, Bec breathed deeply, "Everything happened so fast." She shook her head in chastisement of herself. "I'm a real idiot. I didn't even say 'thank you' to Ryan. I know it sounds weird, but my reaction was to worry about Phil! Can you believe it?"

Jen put an arm around Bec and let her talk.

"I even yelled at Ryan, even though it was Phil who threw the first punch. You know, I don't think Ryan even hit back. The two of them just seemed to fall. I should have said 'thank you' or something. Ryan must think I'm a real psycho." The tears started to flow again.

Jen rubbed Bec's shoulders. "I wouldn't worry about Ryan. He's a good guy. He'll understand that you were just in shock about the whole thing."

As the sun sank and the shadows grew longer in the living room, Bec gradually regained her composure. She could just make out the golden-red of the sun as slid behind the dusty horizon and she decided that as the sun went down, so to would her feelings for Phil. She would not allow herself to wallow in self-pity any longer.