❝You are a danger to me.❞
He confessed, holding his glare on her. A look of surprise graces her features as she absorbed the words, and she fought to control the shiver that ran down her spine.
_________________________
She joined The Resis...
She lay on her back, her arms folded over her stomach with her fingers intertwined. Her brilliant green eyes simply bore into the metal ceiling above her. She was lost in her thoughts, as she was so good at doing.
A battle of moral waged in her head. She knew what she was doing was wrong. Wrong on many levels, and she knew that she was digging herself deeper into this hole. The dark side was wrapping its wicked tendrils around her body, seeping into her skin and tightening every day she spent here. She seemed to have lost the will to fight it. It didn't help that the one person on this damned ship she felt any connection with, was literally forcing her to embrace it. She wondered if he felt this way when he was learning. He must have, if she can still feel the conflict in his being.
A soft sigh escaped her lips, her eyes slowly sinking shut as she thought about how disappointed her brother would have been if he saw her now. Hell, she was disappointed in herself. She often times thought about abandoning her plan to overthrow Kylo, and simply accept her place as it is. She was to be a Dark Knight. Like him.
Her list grew larger over time; He was much stronger than her. The chances of defeating him were slim to none. She was alone now, her only remaining family struck down by the man she found herself drawn to. The pain still stung in her chest when she thought about it.
And he was teaching her things she would have never known on her own, let alone with the Resistance. He was showing her that she was capable of so much more.
Avatra's eyes screwed shut as she thought about everything. It was too much, and she felt a headache slowly make its way through her skull.
And the one thing that made this so much more difficult, was that she had fallen for him. It was mind boggling, and absolutely disdainful. She hated herself more for that, than anything else. But it wasn't like she didn't hate him. No, she still felt that hate in her chest for him, and she still wanted to hurt him. She doubted that would ever leave.
"Stupid man." She breathed out, opening her eyes and staring once more.
You should be mindful of the things you think, Avatra.
His voice range in her ears and she jolted up, staring straight at the door as though he was standing there. But he was nowhere to be seen.
Why are you in my head? This room is the only place of solace for me.
She furrowed her brows as she thought of him, projecting her thoughts to him, wherever he was. She felt a little silly, sitting there staring at the door as she waited for a reply.
It's difficult to ignore when you're projecting your thoughts straight at me.
Her face flushed from color as she realized what he said. She was thinking of him. Anything she thought about him would project straight to him. Weather she wanted it to or not. She couldn't help but notice the tinge of annoyance that laced his voice. He had heard everything.
I...Apologize. I will try to keep a hold on my thoughts.
She waited for his reply, simply sitting there with her legs crossed, eyes boring into the door.
Hating me is for the better. It will bring you far less pain.
Avatra raised her brows at this, her chest tightening at his words. Sadly, she knew that he was right. And for everything she's learnt since she boarded this ship, she knew that hate and anger would get you much further than any other emotion.
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She had been in her room for two days now, and she was steadily growing insane. They had permitted her a datapad, which held a couple informative videos of the First Order, like a sort of orientation, and a few simple stories. She had read them twice now.
She sighed deeply, tossing the datapad on her bed as she paced the room. It had been three days since she kissed him. Three days since she last saw his face. She heard him in her thoughts, and that helped with the internal digging inside her, the one that wanted to grab him by his hair and pull him into a kiss, and to think, she had hated literally everything about him just a few months ago.
She didn't realize it until just now, but she had been aboard this ship for at least 3 months, and she hasn't once been able to explore it. She was simply confined to her bedroom like a prisoner, or an unruly teenager. It made her face grow hot with frustration. Was she still considered a prisoner? With a huff of her breath, she plopped herself down on the edge of her mattress, bringing her legs up and crossing them, before closing her eyes.
Kylo?
She waited a moment, but there was no response. She pursed her lips,
Hello? Can you hear me?
Nothing.
She let out the most impatient, annoyed groan as she threw herself back onto the mattress.
Her mind began to wander again. Things that she felt ashamed of crossed her thoughts, and before she knew it, she was thinking of him---His large hand gently cradling the side of her face as his fingers gripped her hair, his lips, surprisingly soft and smooth, pressed against hers. The way their bodies seemed to fit together that day, him towering over her as she seemingly fit into the curves and planes of his torso and hips. Her heart was picking up in her chest as she recalled everything perfectly, and she wanted so badly to do it again.
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General Hux's somewhat shrill, and incredibly annoying voice seemed to fade into the background of Kylo's mind. Instead, he was getting bombarded with images and words that seemed to completely put a halt to everything else he was currently thinking of. She was thinking about him. Not in her usual, violent way, where she would imagine ways to hurt him or how much she loathed him, but in a way that pulled a string inside him he hadn't felt in years. It was like she was playing a movie in his head, one where they're bodies touched and their lips pressed together, where she didn't hate him, but instead, lusted for him. Needless to say, Kylo was completely distracted, and if a little honest, aroused.
"Ren. REN." Hux seemed to drag him back to the real world, the one where they talked about the plans and strategy of launching the Starkiller's weapon. The planet's they targeted, and what their plans were if something were to happen. Yes, Hux was very big on making plans, but how often do they really go how they're supposed to?
Kylo quickly sat straight, attempting to block out Avatra's accidental barrage of lust, as he resumed talking with the Generals and Commanders.
As he listened to the leaders drone on about their missions, Kylo made it a mental point to teach Avatra about mind projecting, and how to control it.
On the other hand, it had been a pleasant surprise...
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I was originally going to leave this chapter out of the book, but I liked it so much I had to share it with you guys! Leave a star please? xoxo
