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I fulfilled Ash's request. We went for a walk or had better say we went out to date. I know my heart is weak but I took her to a big arcade. We buy unlimited rides tickets and enjoy fun in the area. I let her ride the scary rides alone because I knew it was dangerous for my condition. I'm happy to watch her while crying in fun. I also heard a few times that she shouted loudly the phrase "I love you". I also repeatedly thumbs up her every time we look at each other's eyes.
I do not really think that's what it's like to love. Every time I see her smiling and laughing is a joy to me. Because of her I had reason to continue living. For her I have learned how to smile and be positive in life.
If maybe I did not met her at the time I wanted to commit suicide under the dark and heavenly sky. If I did not try to find a star though I knew it was impossible. If I did not pay attention to a woman speaking to a star she could not see. I might have gone a long way ago, maybe I've been a lonely star. Well, I was saved by a woman who struggled to gain a positive outlook on life despite her difficulty, like me. And she is my girlfriend now and future wife. I intend to marry her when I'm in good condition. When the operation is over.
The mini-roller coaster she've rode stopped and I just stared at her smiling face as she approached me. I caress my chest when it suddenly started to panic. I can not be excited. My heart can not be moved aloud because it can kill me. I can not love, but Ash's love is the only thing that keeps me alive today.
"Hey are you okay? You wanna go home now? Should we go to a doctor?"
Ash's question to me. I can see the worries on her face so I arranged for myself and tried to smile.
"No, I'm fine. Just bit tired. Let's sit down for a while before we look for another ride."
I told her and so she nodded. Ash, immediately look for a seat and we settle down. She lean her head on my shoulder and wrap her tiny arms on mine.
"I have a question." She asked and I humm as an answer.
"You will change your heart and I live there. When you wake up from surgery, do you think, you still love me?"
I laughed at Ash's question. But, I also think of it because of that. I removed the coiled hand of Ash to me and I turned to her. I grabbed her hand and then squeezed it. I looked at her beautiful eyes with love.
"Even though I've had a heart change or even my entire internal organs. I love you only, Ash."
I saw her cheeks red and her eyes were watered. I took advantage of the moment and kissed her on her forehead. I heard her whisper "I love you too, the most" and that made my heart flinch a bit. My heart is back in pain but it's more painful now.
"Ash!" I grunt and grabbed my chest because it feels like squeezing inside. I had a hard time breathing and my eyes seemed dark. I felt Ash's embracing me as she shouted "help". I tried to clear my eyes when I heard a lot of voices around me. They're all stunned but I can not see anymore. I tried to look back at Ash and what I found was her wet cheeks because of tears. for the last time I called her name.
"Ashley."
P. S This will be my last update for now because this author is getting married. Don't tell anyone about it. See my next update next month.
-sent.
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The coffee gets cool, as well as the cupcakes cooked by my sister Kelli. I was inspired to write. Besides, I know my next update will took time, so I made it this morning. I also feel the stares that my sister has given to me but I do not pay attention to it. Yes, I have never told her I'm getting married.
"What's with you today? You seem very happy huh." Kelli exclaimed while sipping gracefully to her cup.
"I'm getting married." I announce cashually and I heard Kelli choke at her coffee.
"You... What? How come you getting married when I cannot even touch my own brother? Who's the unfortunate woman?" She exclaimed and still can't believe what she've just learned.
"Ashley Robertson, your model."
Kelli's jaw dropped. I close the laptop after the mail finally sent and sip on my cold coffee and took a small bite at the pancake. I stood up and arrange my neck tie. Kelli, eventually after few seconds stood up and approach me.
"Can I embrace my soon to be in marriage life without being in a relationship brother, now?" She chuckled and open wide her arms.
"In my wedding day. I'll think if I will let you hug me."
I wink at her and carried my bag consist of laptop and some folders and about to exit the dining area when Kelli squeal again that made me stop and tremble.
"Oh God! Can't wait to see my untouchable brother kiss a girl!"
I flinched my fist and took a deep sigh. Why didn't I thought of it? Does wedding really need that? I mean, kissing your bride in front of other people? That's gross and exciting. Whoa! What am I thinking?
"Whatever!"
I said loudly and exited the dining area for real and I found Taehyung leaning on the wall just outside the dining area. I don't mean to give him glance or any fucks but he didn't let me go without his remarks.
"So, the neat freak is getting married huh. I thought your not greedy but you actually ask an innocent girl to marry you for the fortune."
I true stop from walking but continue when Tae's has done ruining my day. But then, he spoke again.
"That girl was Ashley, Right? Anyway, I got some news for you."
I was force to face him because I know Taehyung will not stop until I lose my shit. Besides, he's losing already. He's not a problem anymore to me. I can kick him out this house from the time I get the 100% share of my fortune.
"What is it? Time is running and I hate wasting it with unimportant person."
I said with my coldest tone and I made sure that all he gets from me is blank stare.
