Trust is such a fragile thing.
Yet, I still give it away so easy.
Maybe that's why I am the way that I am. Maybe that's why I feel like I'm slowly bleeding out; maybe it's from all the knifes in my back.
Sure, I've been backstabbed before, but only a couple still throb with a burning sting. Only a couple cause me to doubt my relationships with others, or doubt myself, or doubt everything.
Each twist of the blade brings agonizing doubt.
Now, I'm never sure if people are really friends with me. Are they only here because they pity me? Will they go behind my back? Slander my name? Tell my secrets?
And my doubt fills me with gut-wrenching guilt.
Shouldn't I trust my friends? I'd want them to trust me. Maybe I'm overreacting, I should just give them the benefit of the doubt.
And then we're back full circle, caught in a horrible cycle of broken trust causing doubt that spreads guilt which pushes me to trust.
Oh God, can I only trust you?
