Mágoa // Spencer Reid

Chapter 49

"Whatever causes night in our souls may leave stars."
Victor Hugo

The words left his mouth before he even realised he was thinking it, Spencer Walter Reid had just confessed his love for Maria to a complete stranger- his mind was now telling him to turn and leave but he didn't, and to his surprise, Julio didn't make him leave. Julio stepped aside and asked that everyone around Maria's bed made some space so Spencer could see her- everyone did as they were asked allowing Spencer to sit next to Maria, he gently took her hand in his- in comparison her hand was so small and dainty, yet she is so strong- he let out a sigh and bowed his head. Her skin in his was cold and paler than usual, her beautiful face was coated with bruises and stitches- her nose had a small bandage over it, it seemed as though every inch of her was hurting- every inch of her was bruised or cut.

Back in the waiting room Hotch and Rossi had decided that the case they had come here to solve would be handed over to another team, because right now they need to find who did this to Maria. That was their priority.

The Vagos gang left Spencer alone with Maria after half an hour or so, the rest of the BAU appeared at the room- They all squeezed into the small, clammy room. Garcia took a seat opposite Spencer, she sat holding Maria's left hand while Spencer held her right hand. JJ and Rossi stood beside Spencer and Derek and Prentiss stood next to Garcia, Hotch the mighty leader stood in the middle at the end of the bed staring down at Maria's lifeless body. After a few minutes of silence Spencer asked Penelope if they could talk outside for a moment.

Spencer couldn't look Penelope in the eyes- thinking about how he had acted made him feel sick the guilt was eating him alive. He didn't normally act like this, he was never this high tempered. The two stood for a moment in silence while Spencer worked himself up to apologise.
"Penelope, I'm sorry. I shouldn't of acted the way I did, I was just so worried. Did you know that 6% of females who survive an attack develop PTSD. 1 in 2 victims of sexual or physical assault develop PTSD." He rambled, Penelope knew that rambling was what he does, and she tried her very best from keeping quiet but she couldn't.

After being told about Maria's self-harm issues Penelope googled some statistics about it, and she didn't plan on telling anyone about what Maria had done, but she couldn't understand why Spencer would be allowed to ramble after being a dick and be forgiven.
"Spencer, did you know 4% of adults 'occasionally' injure themselves." She blurted, immediately after the words left her mouth she covered her mouth with her hands, Spencer raised an eyebrow.

"Penelope I don't understand, why are you telling me that?" He asked and Penelope could practically see the cogs in his head turning, "Has Maria? Is she in the 4%? Because you wouldn't tell me that unless it was relevant and we were talking about Maria so-" He chattered, Penelope didn't answer, but her silence was enough of an answer, "w-when?" he stuttered, Penelope shrugged her shoulders,
"They doctor said they were recent, within the last few days." Spencer paled and his knees began to shake, and he bit his lip Garcia knew why- Maria had told her about how Spencer had led her on and split up with her- how he had chosen Evie. Normally Penelope would assure him that it surely wasn't his fault and that no one was to blame, or that these things happen. But in reality, he had hurt her best friend and as a result she had turned to hurting herself, and as much as Maria was in control, Spencer was to blame.

When it came to around six the BAU decided to go and get some food from the cafeteria, Spencer had attempted to stay at Maria's side but Hotch had ordered him to eat- so he reluctantly went to the cafeteria with the team, where they all began eating some bland hospital food. While the team were away eating Maria began to wake up, her eyes fluttered open and she stretched her arms and legs. She wiggled her toes and her fingers, and then she remembered what had happened- her heart rate increased and the monitor beside her began to beep rapidly. Once she had calmed down, realising that she was safe her eyes fluttered shut briefly, but they quickly re-opened upon spotting a silhouette in the door frame. As her eyes focused on the person at the door her heart rate sped up again, the person drifted to her side and placed a bouquet of light pink roses on the table next to her bed.

"Hey, shhh. You are okay. Breathe, C'mon Naomi- breathe, that's it. Keep breathing." The voice was low and soothing, she looked up to see some familiar green orbs staring at her, she tried to speak, but her throat was dry and instead a pained groan came out.

"Julio found my number in your purse, he called it to find out who I was and I told him that we met last night, he told me you were here- so I came. A-are you okay?" She gave a small smile to the man sat beside her, and then she swallowed and spoke.

"Ben-" Her voice was more a croak, but Ben had heard her. He smiled at her gently taking her hand in his, and rubbing circles on her palm. She was completely shocked that Ben was here for her, he was here, holding her hand. And she had only met him last night, just before the attack- Ben was here for her, and all she could think was that Spencer wasn't.

Spencer had wolfed down his 'meal' and practically ran back to the ICU, he froze in his tracks when he reached the door- Maria was awake, and there was a man sat- exactly where he had been sat just 20 minutes ago. The man was caressing Maria's hand and smiling at her, his smile spread from ear to ear.

Spencer coughed and Maria's eyes broke away from the man sat next to her and locked with his, the man spun around to face Spencer- the smile not dropping from his face before he stood up and approached Spencer.

"Hi, I'm Ben." He held his hand out to Spencer.
"Ben, h-he d-doesn't h-hands." Maria groaned from her bed, but by this point Spencer had taken Ben's hand in his and shook it.

"I'm Spencer, Spencer Reid."