Mrs Darcy (Complete)

Chapter 31

After this morning's fine breakfast, I was in a better mood for the baby's christening and by the time Fitz and I had stopped making kissy faces at each other from across the table at the family's breakfast, it was time to ready ourselves for the christening. I was dressed in a beautiful pale pink dress which my mother had made for me for the occasion by the seamstress in the village and I was probably as in love with this one as I was my wedding dress.

In the carriage on the way through the fields toward the town, I had my baby in the arms of the governess sitting opposite me and the way she was holding my little girl wasn't right. She wasn't supporting her tiny head and her little fingers were grasping at her chest as though she were looking for a breast of milk. The older woman was just gazing out of the window and ignoring the precious life in her arms that Fitz and I had created ourselves. She was so arrogant with my daughter as soon as she was handed over to her, and I had never liked her anyway. With a quick glance out the window, I could see that we were only a couple of metres away from the gated entrance to the village, and an idea hitched itself into my head. If it were cruel or not, I still would have gone through with it. As if on que, the guard riding in uniform on a white horse looked into the carriage at me and I gave him a subtle nod and slight wink which was my signal to stop the coach. The guard rode forward to the front of the coach and relayed my message to the driver, who swiftly slowed the horses down until they stopped.

"My lady, are you alright?" The governess asked, her missing teeth showing in her mouth as she spoke to me. I had no idea who employed her, but I wouldn't have done it.

"Don't speak to me" I replied, but didn't look at her face. She was covered in warts and was almost in her old age compared to me, and for that reason and many more that would be too harsh to reiterate, I had the thought on the tip of my tongue that she should be fired. I stood as much as I could inside the coach and approached the woman with my arms out and was about to take my baby from her, but she turned her body away as though trying to get herself fired. My baby started to cry at the woman's sudden arm movements and I gave her a wide eyed and authoritative look as the world beyond the now open carriage door didn't matter to me at that moment. "Please hand over my baby to me, or face the loss of your job!" I snapped and my child was soon handed right back to me and I was happy this had happened.

"Mrs Darcy?" I heard the governess question.

I turned to address her, holding my daughter in both arms, supporting her head with the crook of my elbow and holding her tiny hand with my fingers. "Send for my sister" I said to the guard at the door. "This is how you should hold a baby, Miss Robinson" I said and she looked at me as though I were crazy. "Now if you would be so kind so to vacate the carriage so I may feed my baby" I stared her down and she continued to look at me though I were crazy, not budging at all. "Your last wage will be sent to your house on Saturday. Now please leave" I said politely to end and indicated the door.

She begrudgingly left the carriage and stormed off down the road back to who knows where, but I hoped I would never see her holding my child again. "Eva, did you finally sack that old woman?" MY little sister asked me as she was helped into the carriage. "I never liked her" She added.

"Yes I did. She was holding her very awkwardly and I didn't like looking at her anyway" I replied as the carriage started moving again and I could get on with feeding my baby, who had stopped crying since I knew how to settle her. But now that the carriage was moving and I was with someone I felt comfortable with whilst exposing myself like that, I was able to remove a breast from my dress and feed my child. I had heard that it wasn't really that nice for women like me to feed my children like that; breastfed. But mother told me that she breastfed Annabelle and myself, and she thought it was alright if nobody saw you. So that was what I had been secretly doing by myself or with mother or Annabelle in the room with me. 

As the carriage pulled up to the church in the village square, my side was brushed by a man coming out of the church as Fitz' family and mine entered in front of us. My eyes unintentionally followed the man as he passed me and i noticed he was walking a little strangely and the back of his head was covered with a little red, purple and black substance, but I couldn't tell what it was as we were walking in opposite directions. It took me a moment, but then I realised what it was. That man was a zombie.