The Journey Home

18 - Divided

Why is it easier to burn than it is to heal?
-Setting Fires by The Chainsmokers

Alexander

The computer stared back at me, taunting me. Mocking me. Of course, it thought that someone in such shitty situation such as myself had to be made fun of. Two hours staring at the damn thing and absolutely nothing done.

"Fuck it," I muttered, standing up and taking a sip of the only thing that could make me forget. A beer.

Making decisions when you're angry, yeah, I don't recommend it. But being me, and being pissed and disappointed as hell, I took out my phone and sent a quick text to the person I knew I shouldn't even be contacting. Of course, it didn't take even two minutes for her to reply.

Alex, of course I'm not busy. Where do you want to meet? - Victoria

I could hear her voice as if she was there. She was a good option, always willing. But I didn't want her. I wasn't a person to get angry much, but when I did, it was something that I couldn't control. The fire burned deep and there was no way of putting it out. Or maybe there was, but she wasn't willing to. She didn't want to.

I'm not sure, Vic. Your place sound good? - Alex

Add drinking to the mix and you're digging yourself a hole so deep that you won't be able to get out of. Everything at this point was frustrating to me. The way that the clock ticked was much too slow. The way the night was full of clouds so that not a star could shine. Hell, even the air felt suffocating.

By the time I downed my fifth beer, I felt a bit more relaxed, yet not enough to forget the whole ordeal with Eileen. Things weren't turning out how I hoped they would, and just when I thought that things between us were improving and perhaps going to work out all this shit happens and the world flips upside down. I lined up the empty beer bottle next to the other four before opening up the sixth one.

"Don't you think that's a bit much?" Lucas asked, leaning against the counter with a worried look on his face. Now, when Lucas asks if you're having a drink too much, that's when you know you're in trouble.

"Doesn't matter," I mumbled, once again finishing another beer in a matter of seconds.

When I tried to get hold of another one, Lucas stood in the way, preventing me from reaching the numbness I wanted to achieve.

"I swear to God, Luke, if you don't move I'll knock you the fuck out."

Luke shrugged but didn't move.

"I don't care. I'm not letting you get drunk. Last time you did I had to deal with you whining about that damn hangover. I'm not dealing with that shit again."

"Get. Out. Of My Way," I said, emphasizing each and every word so that he'd get the point.

He crossed his arms over his chest, without moving. Before I knew it, my fist had landed hard on his jaw, my knuckles immediately feeling the burn and pain. He moved his jaw from side to side, but again, stayed exactly where he was.

I knew it hurt, because the bastard winced but if anything, Luke was used to the pain. Fighting was a hobby of his in our younger years.

"Fuck you," I sneered, looking at the two new text messages on my phone.

Do you want me to wear that red lace set that you like? - Victoria

I'm sorry. Please call me, Alex. - Eileen

Before I had a chance to I was pushed back against the counter, with Luke's arm over my throat. Ah, Luke wanted to fight. Just what I needed.

"Why the fuck are you meeting with Victoria?" He asked, not letting up his grip.