The Journey Home

35 - Our Star

Stars don't disappear, they keep blazing

Even when the night is over

That's how I find the light

-Stargazing by Kygo ft. Justin Jesso

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Eileen

Despite the night Alex and I had spent together, things were still tense. We barely spoke. He would text me every day to ask how I was doing but other than that, we didn't speak. It broke my heart, but he needed space and so did I. We were both in pain and didn't know how to deal with it.

He wasn't talking to Luke, either. In fact, Luke was staying with me at my dad's. Their interactions were quite interesting, but Luke was so overwhelmed with the situation with Alex that he didn't try to annoy my dad much. That's how I knew that he was disappointed. 

But I missed Alex, especially on this day.

Angie's birthday.

We had made plans to visit Angie's grave, but he hadn't text me so far and it was already past noon. Luke had volunteered to go with me, but I wanted Alex. I at least needed his presence even if he didn't hold me.

Sometimes just seeing someone eases the pain without even hugging, without talking. I knew that it would be the case if Alex was there with me. I needed to visit Angie, if not I wouldn't get the closure that I needed. I had come to terms with her death, but there were certain things I wanted to say to her, even if I knew that she couldn't hear me. 

Addie had tried to contact Luke, but he was angry. Ignoring all her calls only seemed to encourage her though, because what had begun as only one or two calls a day, became six or seven. He claimed he wasn't holding a grudge, but that he didn't want to say something that he would regret.  

I fell asleep for a couple of hours while Luke watched TV in my room. He always spent his time with me when he wasn't working. I think he feared confronting the fact that his friendship with Alex may never be the same. He had even said to me that he was starting to look for his own place.

"Leenie, dear, your phone," I opened my eyes only to find Luke's blue one's looking down at me. "Alex is calling you."

At the mention of his name all sleep was gone. I sat up, and tried to contain my happiness. Maybe we would be able to visit Angie after all.

"Hey," I said. 

"Hey, were you sleeping?" Alex asked. I heard his car turning on in the background. 

"Yes, a little bit. How are you?" 

"Good. I was wondering if you still wanted to visit Angie? I know it's a bit late but I got busy. I got the job at the university."

"You did?" He'd been looking forward to it. Things were looking up for Alex after all. 

"Yes," he said with a small chuckle. "Do you want to go?"

I glanced over at Luke, who was acting like he was't listening to the conversation. He smiled though, when he guessed that Alex had gotten the job.

"I do. But I want Luke to come with us."

Alex sighed. "It's only fair that he comes. I'll be there in a few, Addie might come along too, though. Marty will be there later."

"Okay, that's fine."