City Of Stars; Dazai Osamu

02. I've Been Doing Well

"Tell me about yourself."

She took a sip of her hot chocolate and put it down, not breaking an eye contact with me for a single second, making me want to look away. I have to admit, it was rather hard to handle the piercing and curious gaze of her (e/c) eyes, which were deeper, than the whole Pacific Ocean.

"What do you want to know?" I asked, raising an eyebrow

"Well~ It's an interview so I actually have to ask questions about your work, but I'm more interested in what your life has been like after we stopped communicating." She answered "So tell me about this first."

(Y/N) kept looking directly in my eyes and she became the first woman, whose constant gaze I couldn't handle. I looked away, at the people outside of the cafe, where we were sitting. I kept silence for a while, thinking about things I should and shouldn't say and also, trying to not get lost in my memories of her.

"Well..." I started "As you can see, I left the Mafia because of some reasons and then, I stayed quiet for two years, before joining the Agency."

(Y/N) kept looking at me strictly, obviously waiting for more details, but sadly, I wasn't going to tell her any. I haven't seen her or at least, heard anything from her for 7 years. I can't trust her again, without getting to know her.

"What about you?" I asked, instead of answering her silent question "What is your story?"

She took a sip of her drink again, sighing

"In about 6 months after we lost contact, my family moved to England because my father was offered a job there. I loved living in Manchester, but I was always missing Japan so I moved back here, two years ago and as you know, I'm a journalist now." She replied, before leaning back on the couch and crossing her arms

Let me tell you something, that I have learned after being friends with (Y/N): she's the type of person, who gives you as much as you give her. If you share your deepest secrets and trust her, she will do the same. If you avoid telling her anything about yourself, she perfectly copies this from you. (Y/N) never opens up, unless you do the same first. And now, it was obvious, that she was mocking me and repeating my way of answering her questions and she knew perfectly well, that this was not what I wanted.

How do some say it? Treat people as you want people to treat you, right?

"I can see, that you're doing fine." I said

For a moment, she got lost in thoughts. I noticed that because of how she usually replies almost immediately after you ask a question, but now, the silence followed my voice and to be honest, I probably know what she was thinking about.

She was thinking about us.

She was thinking about our past friendship, about Dazai Osamu, that she used to know and Dazai Osamu, that was sitting in front of her. She was thinking about the person, who she used to meet every day and the person, who she had no idea what to talk about with.

She was thinking about times, when I used to meet her every day after she finished school and how I would walk her home. At that time, I wasn't as busy as I became later so I could allow myself such a way to pass time. I remember, that when I was sent on a mission to another city, we would text each other every day until I came back. When I was fifteen, I was less careful, than I was supposed to be and I didn't think about all the possible consequences of having a civilian friend so I wasn't afraid of spending so much time with her...

Until one thing happened.

"You know," She finally said "I'm actually doing wonderful~!"

She smiled widely as a bright spark appeared in her eyes

"I met lots of amazing people in my workplace~!" She said "And I have quite a lot of reliable friends~ I even have a boyfriend~"

"A boyfriend?" I asked, surprisedly "Who is he?"

"Well....His name is..." She made a pause as she coughed a little and then, continued "His name is Kai! Kai Himura! And he's a photographer~ He's the best boyfriend in the world~ He's caring and loving~ And also, he's very handsome~"

Something nostalgic woke up inside of me as it ached for a brief moment. I could feel a slight discomfort somewhere in my chest, but I brushed it off quickly, lulling my nostalgia back to its sleep.

"I can tell from your words, that he really is wonderful~" I said

"What about you? I'm sure, that you have a significant other too~" She asked

"Um...actually I don't." I replied "I don't think, that I'm ready to trust anyone with my secrets and story. Well, you know what I'm talking about."

Her smile fell as her whole facial expression suddenly darkened

"I'm sorry for asking." She apologized

"It's fine." I answered "Oh and (Y/N), you know..."

"I'm afraid, I have to go now."

She interrupted me and took her bag quickly, before standing up and leaving me confusedly.

Did I do something wrong?

"Oh....alright then." I said "It was nice to meet you again."

"Yeah, indeed~"

She quickly said goodbye and rushed out of the cafe, leaving me there, confused and buried in questions, although this happened after each of our meetings.

What surprised me the most was that she didn't ask that one question, that I always thought she wanted to know the answer to. She was the kind of person, who wouldn't hesitate to do anything to get an answer, but now, she just left without even trying. I thought, she wanted to know why I stopped meeting her without telling her any reason to my behavior...but seems like I was actually the only one, who thought so

Indeed, what a peculiar woman, but I don't think, that we will ever meet again

~~~

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If you guess what film inspired me to write this story, I'll love you forever. I'll give you a hint: it's connected to the title of this book (the title is not the name of the film)