Only Bad Girls Get Good Grades

I've Tried So Hard To Keep It Together.

Smack.

"And That's for being the filthy shit headed whore you are. The one you will always be." A few tears fall from my eyes as I pick myself of the ground and attempt to crawl up the stairs. I lay in my room, on my bed, feeling Hopeless.  It sometimes wasn't Just my father. It was him and his buddies, most of them being in their early to late forties and still drunkards. It was one of them now. I don't remember the names, all except for one. 

Ashton.

He was in his earlier thirties, which never makes sense to me. Why does he hang around such older men? But that's not what makes me remember him. Oh that would never be enough for me to remember one of those disgusting creatures. 

Sometimes at night he will come in my room and try to feel me up. I usually push him away, trying to get as far as possible from the bitch, but he does it so fucking often, pushing it a little farther each time.

My bedroom doesn't lock, It never has no matter how much I wish it did. So I just push him away everytime, he usually mutters something like "Your Just a whore anyways" or "Stupid Bitch." and walks out. But it sickens me everytime. 

And whats worse is that I'm lying to Gerard about all of this. I've told him that he isn't beating me physically much anymore. One of the biggest lies I've ever said because for the last month, I have been pained and alone. Freddy and James aren't talking to me right now. Correction: still aren't talking to me. James has lost all of his popularity. All of his friends have left him. He now hangs out with Freddy and Freddy only. Freddy is the same, except for the fact James old friends are bullying him for turning James Gay. I wish he would talk to me. In school, I sit alone in a corner of the lunchroom. I just ignore everyone like they ignore me. I haven't really talk to anyone in school, My younger brother still has to ignore me in school, having to act like he never cared about me. I don't want him to go through what James is. 

Josh doesn't deserve it and Neither does James, but no one can find who did it and no one cares enough to dig. Poor James.

I hear a knock on my door then it cracks open. I cringe lightly, Expecting ashton, but I hear a little voice say "Rissie?"

"Hannah, What are you doing up."

"I got scared. I could hear them." My face drops to sadness, feeling sympathy for her. She must be terrified of him. "Can I sleep in here with you, Rissie?"

"Of course you can, Han" She crawls up the bed and lies down next to me, snuggling into me. I wrap my arms around her protectively, knowing at the same time she keeps me safe too. I need her as much as she needs me. I think she knows that too. She turns to face me and she wraps her arms around me lovingly, staying close. After a while I hear her soft snores, meaning she was asleep. I snuggle closer to her and feeling conforted, I fall asleep.

~

In the morning, I woke up with hannah still wrapped to me and a full nights sleep, the first one in a while. It was wonderful. She was my little savior. I shifted, causing her to wake up and yawn. She was so adorable. I love how innocent she is, even in this fucked up world we live in. She's my tiny hero. My little angel. I love her, I would protect her with my life. I want her to grow up like I did with Noah. I'll make sure of it.

"Rissie?"

"Good morning Hannah. Its time to get up." I say, kissing her forhead. she smiles and snuggles into me.

"I don't wanna get up. It's saturday anyway." she mutters, sounding like me. I chuckle and squeeze her.

"What about if you and I go get breakfast from Ihop or something. Would you get up for some pancakes and sausage links?"