anxiety.

nine.

"make my messes matter. make this chaos count. let every fracture in me shatter out loud."

scarlett.

my eyes doubled twice in size.

"c-connor?" i gulped in disbelief . "what are y-you doing here?"

"funny. i was about to ask you the same question." he spat, disappoint laced in his voice. "too busy with your family, huh?"

"i - i - um -"

he cut off my weak explanation. "that's what i thought. and what are you doing here with him?" he nodded his head toward mason. i took my hand out of mason's, rubbing it against my jeans.

"i-"

"you told me you weren't gonna see him anymore. you lied to me, scar." he accused, taking a step forward.

"we weren't seeing each other last time we talked. he-"

"ever since you met him, you've been ditching me awfully lot. and now i find out you lied to me? you choose him over me, then you lie that you're not together, then you lie about not being able to hang out. any other things you've been lying to me about? what happened to the carnival being our thing? what happened to our friendship? you're really gonna abandon me for him? do you not remember our argument the other day? do i not matter to you at all?" he said, getting closer with each question until he was almost right in front of my face. i felt my face turn bright red.

"our friendship does matter! i'm just going through a tough time right now-" i tried to get out before i felt connor's hand connect with my cheek. he had just slapped me. i felt a tear roll down my cheek.

"woah man!" mason jumped in, cradling me in his arms to protect me. i cried as i hid my face in his chest. connor's friends pulled him back before anything worse happened. "i think you need to back off. don't you ever lay your hands on her. what the fuck is wrong with you connor?"

"what the fuck is wrong with me? why don't you ask her what the fuck is wrong with her?" he yelled, walking away with his friends.

when connor was far enough in the distance, mason pulled me away from him slightly and gently grabbed my chin. "are you okay love? i think it's time we go home." i nodded and sobbed back into his shoulder letting him guide me through the rest of the fairground. he stopped by the cubbies to grab our stuffed animals before escorting me back to the car.

the tears hadn't stopped and my cheek was throbbing with pain. i was so upset, i didn't even let mason open the door for me. i gently shut it as i silently cried with my head down. i heard the rumble of the ignition. mason started driving fast, i knew he was going over the speed limit but i simply didn't care.

we arrived back at his home much faster than it had taken us to get there and thank god with no speeding tickets. he opened my door and picked me up, supporting me by my bum. i laid my head on his shoulder and let him carry me inside, something i would have normally been opposed to. he set me down on the counter of his kitchen and grabbed my chin, gently turning my head.

"a bruise is forming." he cautioned, lightly brushing his fingers over it. i pulled back from the pain. i was still crying and hiccuped every so often. "calm down babe, you're okay now. i'm not going anywhere." he said, settling his hands down on my knees. he let go and walked to his freezer to get an ice pack. he wrapped it in a towel to prevent the harshness of the cold. his hands land back on my knee and he gently rested the ice on my cheek. we just stand there for a moment, his eyes searching for answers in mine. i have to admit the presence of his hands on my knees calmed me down enough to where i can get my tears under control.