Prompt: "There are two kinds of people in this world," my companion slurred, pausing to take another artless swig. "Those who ______ and those who _______."
Story:
Back at it again in my local pub, Alex has been drinking all night, must be one of those "days" with the missus.
"You know what Jess?" He asks, with that "un-sober" tone of his when he's had way too much to drink.
I simply look at him and his laid back posture in our usual seat, with that folded sleeves on his darkened red checkered polo shirt matched with that messy swoop on his hair. If I wasn't his best friend, I would've dragged his butt back home to his wife way before he got drunk like how he is now.
But you wanna know something? I kinda like drunk Alex.
"There are two kinds of people in this world," my companion slurred, pausing to take another artless swig. "Those who leave the toilet seat up and those who put it back down".
"You're a girl right Jess?" He continued.
I chuckled. "I'm glad you noticed"
"How would you feel if someone left the toilet seat up and then you come along and just do your business, but then you'd feel the cold touch of that hard marbled toilet, PLUS, if you're unlucky enough, you may feel a few drops of warm pee just as when you sit down" That's just messed up Alex.
I swayed my head. Okay, that's it, he's too drunk.
"They are monsters, and I hope they die. Now, let's get you home." I joked. I then stood up from our seat, but Alex still has a grip on his bottle. I sighed.
I struggled to take the bottle away from him. "No. Jess. I'm not drunk." There he goes again.
"Well I didn't say you were, smartass." He didn't mind my snarky remark, instead he started giggling. I managed to take the bottle away from him, and proceeded to carry him up, but failing miserably at it.
"Come on Alex, get up." I pulled his arm and put it around my neck and helped him up his seat then left money to cover the tab. Thankfully, he complied quicker than he usually would and helped me wobble our way to my car. The smell of beer mixed with his cologne lingered around my nose as he mumbled incoherent words.
He's already passed out when I sat on the driver's seat. The drive to Alex's house was quiet, I kept checking in on him to see if he's still alright.
When we got to his house, I parked at their driveway and stayed for a bit and took one quick whiff on Alex's cologne until I rang the doorbell.
"Thanks again for bringing him home." Maya, Alex's wife greeted me at the door.
"No problem" I put on a fake smile.
Maya's brother, Bruce, was staying with them, he's a big guy, so he carried Alex inside alone. I said my goodbyes and went my way as well.
Maybe, not wearing lipstick was the wrong move.
YOU ARE READING
Prompted Shorties
General FictionThese are stories that I make with a pre-made prompt for me. I try to limit it to 500 words or less but most of the time I get carried away. I hope you enjoy and I'll try to keep adding new ones whenever I get the chance to revisit the site.
