Prompted Shorties

End of the Road

Prompt: Think back to a moment where you've come to the end of the road with something important in your life—a relationship with a lover; moving out of your childhood home; graduation from school; etc. Write a scene wrapped around that moment, describing how you felt (good and bad) and how you closed the door on that chapter in your life.

Story:

June 4, 2017

That was the beginning of the end. I remember that day like it was yesterday. The sun was beaming its hot rays into our window, the wind was silent for once, our Pomeranian laid her tongue out on that heated Sunday as she lay on the marbled floor of our living room.

My mind was never silent, nor calm that day. It kept rethinking the same two options in my head more than ten times every second. Should I or shouldn't I go?

I kept a straight face on my couch that day, contemplating on that same thought over and over and over again. I couldn't handle the pressure, I couldn't handle the guilt and I can't keep my body from fidgeting. I was all over the place. My thoughts are eating me up inside.

Should I go? But if I go, I'll have to endure it all alone with my little sister. I used to do this with two friends, but now they don't even show up. They had valid excuses, whereas for me, my excuse was that my two friends aren't there anymore.

I'm shy and an introvert. I'm also fat but this place that I go to keeps me from being that.

Should I not go? But if I don't, I'd feel guilty for not going. I might make my coach upset or something and I'd hate to do that to someone, even if I barely know them.

Swimming was the second most enjoyable part of my weekends, sure it was tiring, but I always had fun together with my two friends. Plus I get to check out hot dudes from time to time.

Swimming was like our doorway towards friendship, but since they stopped going, I felt alone, left out, lonely and a little bit betrayed. They were the reason why I still continued going after my first course. Now I don't even know why I should go.

That's why I've been contemplating whether to still go or not. I didn't care how much calories I was burning, even if it was a lot, I just wanted my two friends to be there with me to make the experience seem bearable.

I couldn't continue going by myself, even if I'm with my little sister. It's not as fun as before. I miss swimming. I do. But I miss swimming with my two friends even more.

Up to this day, I still think of going swimming by myself on the weekends, even if my coach isn't there anymore. But I couldn't make myself go even if I wanted to. I wouldn't know what to do or say once I get there because I'm alone, I'd feel out of place, I'd feel stupid for going by myself so in the end I never go.