Adrenaline

Keith's Decision

Needing help was foreign to Keith but he had to endure it if he wanted to go anywhere in the castle. Keith thought he could do it himself but after being discovered trying to crawl very unsuccessfully more than once, he had to accept that they wouldn't let him. At least being carried around was less embarrassing than when Hunk insisted Keith couldn't use the bathroom by himself. Now he was just brought there and left on the toilet and sitting down while peeing or having trouble wiping was far more preferable than getting help for that.

Didn't mean he had to like the rest of all of the help though and no one was in doubt about how little Keith liked it despite Keith turning voluntarily mute most of the time. At least Lance didn't try to carry Keith over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and had opted for giving Keith a piggyback ride. As modifying as having Lance of all people carry him around, Keith appreciated not having a bony shoulder jammed into his soft stomach and just generally being embarrassed about being handled like a carcass.

Actually, Keith seemed to be the only one who found Lance carrying him weird and maybe it wasn't. Pidge and Coran had been out of the question from the get-go with Pidge being a weak 14-year-old girl and Coran doing so much already that Keith wasn't sure if the man ever slept.

Allura could probably have thrown a tank one-armed if she wanted to, Keith had seen her training and wasn't fooled by those skinny arms, but having the princess carry him around would just have been weird. Besides, Coran would usually kill anyone suggesting they were entitled to have Allura carrying them and he had been more protective of Allura than he usually was since Keith awoke. Which left only Hunk and Lance since Shiro had tried his best to keep his distance from Keith since he awoke 9 days prior.

"Keith?" Lance huffed and Keith lifted his head to look properly at the back of Lance's head instead of dreaming himself far away from straddling Lance. "Can I sit you down for a moment?"

Keith lifted one hand from where he had kept a grip on Lance's shirt and looked to make sure he didn't poke Lance's eye again as he gave a thumb-up. Lance lowered Keith gracelessly to the ground.

"I'm just gonna..." Lance said as he pointed in the general direction of his room. Keith couldn't be completely sure but he was pretty sure no one would understand exactly what exactly Lance meant but found himself not caring and just waiting for Lance to leave. It wasn't like anything really mattered anymore. The food was bland and felt weird in his mouth, he couldn't even walk or talk properly, and if the Galra attacked he would just be in the way and he had a worse viability than a stereotypical fairytale princess.

He wasn't sad, just empty. An emptiness that felt far heavier than anything ever had before. It was a weight deep inside his stomach. It was so heavy that he was sure his rabidly weakening limps would soon give out permanently and his flame once blazing brighter than any sun and twice as volatile would die down to nothing. Maybe his once great wings could have carried him to somewhere where the weight could have been removed and his flame relit but they were chipped. He missed those wings but there would be no flying away when things got tough anymore, at least not physically. His mind therefore did it for him every time the outside became too quiet or conversations became too rapid for his ears to follow even though it had once been so easy. He dreamed of silence from his internal and external struggles but the emptiness would still overpower him at times.

Keith laid down on the floor, looking up at the ceiling as he waited. Just like an infant, he couldn't even sit up without help from a person or an object and as a result got to admire how clean Coran kept everything. If anyone in the castle were paid in other things than room and board, Keith would have told Allura that Coran deserved a raise.

Keith turned his head and looked up at the two buttons on the wall. Both square and gray. Nothing special to look at really, but he couldn't keep his eyes off them. It took him surprisingly long but he eventually recognized it as the buttons to open and close the airlock standing dull but proud a small distance away from him.