Heaven ── TOM HOLLAND

35. True Family

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The cold, dirty cell inhabited exactly how Orion felt at that moment.

She'd been lead to a cell to be on her own, her friends scattered about the holding cells quarter, none of them close to one another. Purposefully, of course. She wasn't allowed even the smallest bit of happiness anymore, that much was understood. But perhaps she was never truly happy. Maybe Tom was right. Her entire life had been utterly dismal, and when she came close to being in a happy time in her life, it all came crumbling down. It was a sign. A sign that Orion Lopez didn't deserve to be happy.

With her knees curled up to her chest, she sat on the aged wooden bench staring at the wall in front of her, her fingers picking at the chipped paint of the bench. All she could think of was what ifs.

What if she never died?

She'd like to imagine she'd maybe be happy alive. She had a mom and a dad who were happily married, according to Baxter. She was their first born, so maybe they would have chosen to have kids after her and she'd always have a guaranteed friend. Maybe they lived in a big house with cute family portraits hanging on the walls and a white-picket fence surrounding their home. She would have loved her mom and dad to pieces, and remained completely oblivious to the misery people experienced in the other part of their lives.

What if she never became an angel?

She'd be an ordinary citizen like everybody else. She would have disappointed Baxter, that's for sure, but he would have eventually gotten over. Maybe she would have been able to work in the office as something else, maybe an assistant or a paid intern. She wouldn't have to deal with new clients every few months, or look through reports for people undeserving of her time.

What if she never met Mateo or Kelsey?

Things would have been a lot more boring, that's for sure. There's no doubting the energetic twins were able to add something new to everyone's life, unwanted or not. If she hadn't met them, she might not be as charismatic as she is, what with all the people Mateo had befriended and forced upon her, but she would have been able to move past that. She also wouldn't have learned how to dance, or get a normal teen experience like the one Mateo was able to show her. She didn't want to imagine a life without Mateo, actually. There's a better what if to ask.

What if she never met Kelsey?

Maybe she'd be happy. Her life wouldn't be so hectic if she didn't know Kelsey Garcia, and that's been true since the first day she met the girl. She wouldn't have to deal with the girl flashing a smirk and twirling her hair to every male within a five-mile radius. She wouldn't be affiliated with any members of a rebellion group, rather than the multiple she is now. If Orion didn't meet Kelsey, she'd probably be cuddling Tom at her house right now, not staring at the brick patterns of a holding cell.

Tom.

What if she never met Tom?

Her heart clenched at the thought of never meeting Tom. Someone she once considered to be an acquaintance, an unwelcome one at that, was now someone she didn't want to live without. What was she before she met him? A robot going from client to client, eager to rack up numbers for a minuscule prize and not caring about the utter misery she felt as she did so. She wasn't living a life worth living before she met Tom. He gave her the first taste of what it was like to truly be happy, and now that was all going to be torn away from her before she got to fully enjoy it.