Sweet Caroline (Corey Crawford)

Uncomfortable Situation

Caroline

After a long two weeks going around Canada and the west coast we get back to Chicago late one night. As soon as I get to my apartment and my head hits the pillow I was fast asleep. And I mean fast.

We had one last game in November which ended up being a loss to the Coyotes then we finally make it to December, my favorite month.

I decide to go out and start my Christmas shopping. I will probably get the goalie crew something and of course Jonny and my dad. The other writers already decided to give each other a peace of mind for Christmas which I thought was hilarious. But other than that I didn't have that many people to gift for.

I walk around Michigan Avenue for four hours collecting gifts. I've amounted quite a bit of money since I live in a cheap apartment and only spend money when I need to. My hotels and food on the road is paid for so I've been able to save up more than I would ever need. Then again I did spend a good chunk of it today.

I get home and start to wrap my presents. I get them all tucked away and ready to hand out. Most of them would have to be given out before Christmas so I wanted to make sure I had everything ready.

On this rare off day I cuddle up in the couch with my kitten and pop some popcorn in my mouth. I decide to watch some old videos of me and my mom and Dad. This one was from some of our adventures at the all star game his last year in Montreal. I really loved it there and wish things could have happened differently. If he would have stayed who knows where that team could have done. The Canadiens haven't won a cup since my dad has left, and as much as that is a good thing for my dad, that was still his team and that team meant a lot to him. He's still a fan favorite back there and is talked about all the time. Sure it's because he was actually insane or because he was a part of one of the most one sided trades in history, but the last of the good memories of that team winning a cup is thanks to my father and everyone knows it.

I smile big as my eyes get fixated on the screen, my dad lifts me over his head and I sit on his shoulders. He starts to run around the hotel room with me laughing so loud, my arms out like a airplane as I fly around the hotel room. My dad flips me over and catches me in his arms before tossing me back in the air.

"Oh please be careful" my mom begs. My dad tosses me to the couch and my giggles finally start to cease. My mom joins us and turns the camera around so we were all in the frame. I feel a tear come up as her beautiful smile lights up the room. I was beginning to look like her which only makes me miss her more. I watch the screen as she kisses my dad then kisses my cheek. She starts to tickle me sending me into giggle fit once again. I was only seven at the time.

"Okay, so we're over halfway through the season here and Patrick is looking good" my mom claims.

"I always look good" my dad teases and I laugh. He always has jokes.

"Anyway. My sweet Caroline is starting to get homeschooled and the rumor is that she hates her teacher" my mom whispers like I couldn't hear her even though she's right new to me.

"That's not true mommy! I love you" I say and she smiles.

"I love you too my sweet girl" she replies.

"What about me" my dad pouts.

"I love you soooo much" she says and he smiles.

The video cuts out and I dry off my tears. My phone starts to ring and I try to pull myself together.

"Hello" I sniffle.

"What's wrong" Corey asks, concern laced in his voice.

"Nothing is wrong, I was watching old home videos. The holidays always make me emotional" I admit.

"Oh, well I was just calling to see if you wanted to come hang out with the guys and their girlfriends" he says.

"What are you guys doing" I wonder.

"Probably just bowling" he admits. I wasn't really up for leaving my house but I loved bowling and I loved the guys, so why not?

"Yeah, sure" I agree.

He gives me the name of the bowling alley and I quickly jump in the shower then grab my things before heading down there.

I get to the bowling alley and quickly find where I need to be. The loud and obnoxious hockey players take up the last six lanes as they tie up their shoes and pick out their balls.

"Yay! She made it" Corey cheers as I walk over. I say hi to all the guys before grabbing shoes and sitting down. Corey sits down next to me and I can feel a pair of eyes on me.

"Is your girlfriend here" I question as he looks like he just got caught in a lie.

"Yeah, she's talking with her friends" he admits.

"I can literally feeing her staring at me" I insist.

"I'm sorry. I'll tell her to stop" he claims about to get up.

"No" I beg grabbing his hand. He looks at mine and I quickly retreat it. "I don't want issues Corey. I think I should just leave" I sigh.

"Please don't leave" he says softly.

"Why would you invite me here when you know your girlfriend hates it when we hang out" I ask. If I knew she would actually show up to these things for once I wouldn't have come.

"Because I'm very fond of you and I like having you around. It's not her say to dictate who I am and am not friends with. I want you in my life and she's going to have to deal with that. You're a very very good friend of mine and a important part of this team. You should be here" he insists.

"I'm not comfortable being here" I admit.

"Does my girlfriend make you uncomfortable" he asks.

"It's not like that" I defend.

"Then what is it? Tell me what it is so I can keep you here" he begs.

"I don't know Crawford. I have all the answers in the world, but when it comes to you... I just don't know. I don't know why you do these things. I don't know why you feel like your life is such a mess when you have a smoking hot girlfriend and a great team in front of you. I don't get why you keep pulling me in like this" I admit.

"I don't get why you're upset? I'm doing everything you suggested. I'm being a better boyfriend and trying to me more in touch with my emotions. I changed my style of play and I'm doing good, what else do you want from me" he asks

"I never asked for any of that... I never wanted you to change for me. You did that all on your own then expected me to just follow you around and be happy for you. But I deserve to be happy too" I insist.

"How can I make you happy? Just tell me and I will do it" he nearly yells.

"It is not your job as my friend to make me happy. I can do that all on my own" I defend.

"So I don't make you happy" he asks and I sigh.

"You do. I swear you do. I just... I cannot keep doing this. It is exhausting. I don't get why I keep agreeing to do these things when we are obviously on two different pages" I admit.

"Because you're my friend, that's what friends do" he claims.

"This is not what friends do. What we are doing, this is not normal. People who are just friends don't randomly seem to find each other on a daily basis and turn something out of nothing. Friends don't say the things that we say to each other. And friends don't keep making their friends feel the way I do when you invite your girlfriend to stuff like this then run off with me. I get that you are trying and I get that you are working on whatever you feel is needed to get better, but I can't keep living like this feeling the way I do. I'm sorry" I say standing up. I set my bowling shoes to the side and grab my things.

"I'm sorry Caroline, I didn't know you felt like this" he insists.

"It's okay Crawford, it was my fault for actually thinking that you might care about me" I sniffle. The emotions were high today.

"I do care" he yells and it falls silent. I stop walking as I feel like everyone's eyes were on me now. "I mean... you know what I mean."

"I don't... and I'm not sure you do either."