Run (A Bucky Barnes Recovery Story)

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The third time Natasha called, Bucky picked up the phone.

“I talked to Fury,” Natasha said. She didn’t ask why Bucky had let the phone ring the first two times.

“When do we start?” Bucky asked. He could hear her shuffling papers on the other end of the line.

“The target is a, uh, hold on,” she stopped herself.

“What?” Bucky asked.

“Your line could be tapped,” she said. “Can we meet and talk about this in person?” Bucky frowned.

“I guess,” he said.

“You wanna take me on another date?” She said and he could hear the smile in her voice, but he wasn’t up for it tonight. He didn’t have the strength to try to be happy and normal and tease back, so he stayed quiet. He just didn’t know what to say. There was an awkward silence as Bucky chastised himself and Natasha cleared her throat. “I was kidding,” she said. “I didn’t mean to, uh-”

“I know,” Bucky said and he wanted to apologize, but he couldn’t bring himself to. There was another pause and he hated himself. He wished he could explain to her that it wasn’t her fault, his stuntedness wasn’t her fault, there was really no one at the heart of the blame except for himself. “How about tomorrow night. Where are you staying, I’ll meet you there.”

“I have an apartment across the road from Steve’s. I’ll wait for you out there,” she said.

“Okay, thanks,” he replied and they exchanged quiet goodbyes and he hung up and berated himself for not being better. Why couldn’t he just get better?!

There was a sharp rap on the door and Bucky looked up. He peered through the peephole cautiously to see a man in a suit, a man he recognized as one of the hotel staff. He opened the door and stared at him, waiting expectantly for the man to explain himself. The man fidgeted a little uncomfortably, clearly unnerved by Bucky.

“The manager would like to see you, sir, if you’d follow me,” the man said, starting to back up. Bucky didn’t move.

“What does he want,” Bucky asked.

“It’s about your stay, sir,” the man replied.

“What about it?” Bucky said. “I’ve made no disturbances.” He was beginning to feel worried.

“You’ll have to discuss it with the manager, sir,” the man said and finally, Bucky stepped out of his doorway and shut the door behind him.

“Fine,” he said. “Take me there.”

The manager’s office was behind the check-in desk at the front and Bucky was left at the door. He let himself into the office and the manager looked up from behind his desk.

“Hi!” he said cheerily. Bucky examined the room as he entered. It was small and white and there were no windows. He glanced down at the manager when he spoke, but other than that, he didn’t acknowledge the man at all. “You can have a seat,” the manager offered, pointing to a chair in front of his desk, but Bucky remained standing. The manager hesitated a second, clearly thrown by Bucky’s unfriendliness, but he carried on regardless. “Kay!” the man said in his overly cheerful voice. “Mr. Smalls, right? Jonathon Smalls?” Bucky nodded, as that was the name he had registered himself under. “How have you been enjoying your stay in DC?” Bucky could have laughed. It was like he was on vacation, here to see the Lincoln Memorial, not fighting for his life against a secret organization that wanted him captured.

“It’s very nice,” Bucky said by way of brushing off the man’s question.

“And what are you doing here?” The man kept going. “Here for work, to see the sights?” Bucky stared at him.