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Jealousy Override

After knowing that what Ley meant about the "special" or "dearest" person to her in school was a girl, I was able to breathe; I mean it was a relief that it was girl, if it were a guy...

Ahhhhh! Ok, ok, I'd get jealous... a little, just a little... okay maybe not, I'd REALLY get jealous of that guy. But thankfully it was a girl, then after chatting with one another, Ley took my hand and as well grabbed the other girl's hand and she just made us shake hands

Ley: Lee this is the person I was talking about yesterday and this is the person that I wanted you to meet, Lee this is Julie

Me: Oh nice to meet you Julie I'm Lee, a friend of Ley

As I looked at her, the girl that I was made to shake hands with, she was a lot different from Ley, my first impression of her was strict, her eyes are like pointing daggers staring at you, and she look waaay more mature than Ley, I was thinking that this was a senior and a senior student that's very close terms with Ley, I thought that I should not mess up this first contact with this student. If I wanted a good shot with Ley then I know that I must really pass this certain meeting.

Suddenly a chill came crawling down my spine, my senses heightened, and I saw a bit of a lip movement about to happen, I know that this very second, this ominous girl, has done observing me and now she is about to deliver her judgment on me, and I am hoping that, I pass this test

"Hi Lee, I'm Julie, Julie Schinei"

My worries were blown away, my thoughts about Julie changed in that split second when I heard her voice, I expected someone colder and harsh, but when I heard her voice, there is no doubt, that she was caring, sweet and loving, just like Ley, from there Julie asked me a bunch of question that made me get to know her in exchange for answering every bit of question, and just like that Julie and me became friends real quick, along with the help of Ley. In amidst our conversation Ley tapped the shoulders of Julie and went on to whisper something to her

While Ley was whispering something, I kind of noticed that Ley was kind of looking at me every time she was whispering something to Julie, after that 2 minute whisper message, Julie was look "Ooh", what does she mean by oh? Now I'm really curious, because the both of them looked at me like I was something or someone suspicious, they both grinned at me and that really got be having goose bumps

"Ley mind of I go talk to Lee for a second" Julie asked Ley as she blinked at her, I think she was supposed to not let me see her do that, but more or less, I know and I feel like these two were up to something. But there was nothing that I could do but to go with the flow, and so Julie went to the other side of the mango tree and called me there, I looked at Ley hoping that she'd tell me something before I go there to the other side, but all she did was grin and waved. I sighed and there I walked towards Julie. As I walked towards Julie I saw Ley talking with Paul under the mango tree, the nervousness that I feel from what was about to happen with the talk of Julie was mixed with hurt of the view that I see Ley smiling as she talked with Paul under that mango tree forming their own world, but I on the other hand had to deal with Julie, I stood in front of her with some distance between us, she waved at me telling me to get closer and so I got closer and just sat in front of her, as I sat I heard her calling my name in a whispering tone and when I looked at her she was signaling me to sit right beside her, and so I did

I slowly took my steps carefully up the bench that I was sitting at and went towards her side near the mango tree, I sat there silent, I mean who could blame me for staying silent in that kind of situation, I mean I barely know her and we just met like a few minutes ago and so my natural reaction was just to stay quiet. I just zoned out there and looked on the fields were kids were playing and just diverted my attention there, having eye contact with someone I don't really know is really hard for me and then "Lee" Julie called out to me, I had no choice but to look and reply "What's up"

Julie: What do you think of her?
Me: Her?

Julie moved her head making a motion that she was pointing out to Ley

Me: oh you mean Ley?
Julie: Yes, honestly, tell me what you think of her
Me: well... she's nice, cute, pretty, intelligent
Julie: We get that a lot when people refer to her, but what I mean Lee is that, what do you think of her, as a girl, I want your insight about her, from you as a guy as a member of the opposite sex

I was feeling confused that moment I mean I did give her the info she wanted right? I did say everything that I thought about Ley

Me: ahm I already told you about-

I was interrupted by Julie by making a statement

Julie: NO! I mean do you have feelings for her? Do you like her?

Julie said with a bit frustrated voice, I mean sorry for me being not able to get your point... now that I think about it... I was left speechless, not a single word came out of my mouth, all I knew was I was staring at Ley as Julie asked that question... and uncontrollably I said "Yeah I guess I do like her" that even I was shocked when those words came out from my mouth

Julie: AHA! I KNEW IT!
Me: Julie, you have the wrong idea
Julie: You like her eh?
Me: It's not like that!
Julie: then tell what it is, Do you really like her?

As I was pressed with this very hard to answer questions, my natural phenomena kicked in "Tell Julie about what you really feel or keep silence of what you truly feel" Thinking about these choices, I really wanted to go to the second one and just keep silent about what I feel for her, I mean even if I say to Julie or to anyone what I felt for Ley, nothing would ever change this great gap, this distance between us, nothing would ever happen for me to get out of the so called friendzone, I didn't want to hope nor assume but mostly I didn't want to get hurt. But there was something that pushed me to say yes, I was not mentally prepared for it nor did I thought it through all I know was, that I was there sitting beside Julie and telling her everything I know and fell about Ley, there I confessed my feelings about Ley

Julie: aww why don't you go for her? You're so sweet to honestly tell me that
Me: I don't know if I should go for her or not... I don't deserve her nor does she deserve someone as low as me
Julie: hey don't say that, you have plenty of strong and good points, you're nice, caring and very loving towards her, just tell her how you feel and I know you guys would be a great couple
Me: if that were that easy Julie I would have done it... but I am afraid to get rejected I feel like, she doesn't like me
Julie: but you like her don't you? Then do it for her

I nodded no about Julie's statement about liking her and said

"Correction Julie... I don't like her... I love her"

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