The Girl Behind The Lens | S.M. (Discontinued)

Part 17- Waves

"I'm dying, my love, you punched a hole right through my heart"

-Shawn Mendes, "I Don't Even Know Your Name"
~~~

Crack.

That was the sound of my heart breaking in two.

The kiss meant nothing to him and I could see he was telling the truth, by the way he just let out a laugh as he finished the sentence. I was foolish enough to think that kiss meant something, that the sparks flew and we had some sort of connection. But I was wrong about everything, and I truly don't deserve any happiness.

I noticed something was wrong when Shawn looked at me differently, showing a hint of sadness.

"Are you crying?" He said and stood closer to me. I slammed the locker door, making him flinch at the sound.

"No, I just have something on my eye and it hurts. Let me go to the bathroom and check it in the mirror" I said as quickly as possible and walked down the corridor, taking a left.

From there I started running, passing the bathroom, and going directly outside through the exit.

The tears went more violent now, making my whole vision blurry.

I knew that getting emotionally involved would be bad. That one of us would get hurt and that our friendship would never be the same. I wish I could erase last night, it was a horrible mistake. My life is a mistake.

I open the door and rapidly turn the car on, not caring about skipping school. I speed up in the highway, already knowing where I am going. The only place that is sacred and peaceful to me.

"I hate this!" I said and hit the wheel as hard as I could, letting my anger out.

It's just the way he said it, was emotionless. It's like I meant nothing to him. When it happened, his eyes lit up in this way I have never seen before and sparks flew but after, it was like a whole new different person. Guess I am not the only one with a mask on.

My stomach grumbles as I get closer to the location. I skipped breakfast because I was too nervous about the kiss. I sometimes skip lunch as well, but only when the day is awful and I just don't have an appetite.

But my sister says otherwise. She sometimes forces me to eat in the mornings, scooping an extra quantity on the plate. I don't know what's her problem, it's not like I am going back to that habit. I hope...

I finally reach the location and park the car in the gravel parking lot, each parking marked my a wooden log laying parallel in the ground. I get off the car and inhale the smooth forest air that I adore. The neon sign catches my eye, being that a new improvement since I last came with....him.

Maybe it wasn't such a good idea coming here, since I showed him this place when he followed me in his bike. Where we laid in the grass deep into the forest and promised me to show me true love. Guess that isn't going to happen any time soon. He basically lost because the only hope I had for love is gone.

I open the wooden door and the bell jingles. I look to my left and see Lola sitting on the desk concentrated, writing something on some blank paper. She looks up and adjusts her eyeglasses, a smile starting to form around her lips.