You Know Your Rights!

Welcome to the Machine

Welcome my son, welcome to the machine
Where have you been?
It's alright we know where you've been
You've been in the pipeline, filling in time
Provided with toys and 'scouting for boys'
You brought a guitar to punish your ma
And you didn't like school, and you
Know you're nobody's fool
So welcome to the machine - Pink Floyd

1991 was such a huge year for both of us. We were both blowing up in our own respective rights and together not only as a band for the public, but I believe as individuals as well. We started to do joint tours and gigs together as well.  Both of our management companies were happy and so were we. We got to play next to each other and not be too far away from each other. I was never a needy person who reveled in companionship and warmth from others, but I felt the need to have you near me at all times. When you left for Europe I was nothing, but scared and alone. It was almost pitiful how pitiful I felt at that time. But that didn't matter now, because I had you right by my side. We were practically joined by the hip at this point in our lives now. And I personally couldn't have been any happier.

We also released our second studio albums during 1991. You released Nevermind on September 24th. While (in keeping up with the spirit of releasing albums during the passing of beloved role models) my band and I released Defenders of Hate on November 22 (Better known as President John F. Kennedy's assassination date).

I remember seeing you up in our apartment all night writing the lyrics to your songs, and messing with the guitar riffs and drum patterns. Seeing you at work making music you enjoyed was riveting to me, and I couldn't have been prouder of you.

I remember the few times I visited you in the studio while you guys were recording. Hearing you scream and sing like that made me think of you being something akin to an opera singer or better yet one of those angels that people dream about. It was so angelic yet so raw and harsh all at once. Hearing you perform was like being hit with a wave of emotions all at once. It was startling yet exotic to see you in your own natural element. It was like gazing out at one of those mysterious star filled skies or watching a mystical animal or being roam around in their natural habitat. It was too perfect and spellbinding to look away from.

You also saw my band and I record a few times as well. Despite, you saying how good we sounded I couldn't help but feel inferior to your talent. It was like I only paled in comparison despite us both dominating the charts around this time, and not even belonging to the same genre. I would always tell myself that I was stupid to keep down playing my own success and to keep comparing it to you, but subconsciously I guess I always felt that your music, talent, and reputation would always proceed mine.

It was one dreary night in Seattle when we found out our lives have changed for good. It was just another late weeknight. You were hunched over eating some preheated tv dinner while I was just mindlessly changing channels. I wasn't even really paying attention until I heard songs that sounded way to familiar to not be ours. When I heard our songs my eyes bulged out of my head in shock while I quickly shot up on the couch.

I gazed aimlessly towards the tv still shellshocked by our appearances on MTV. What the fuck? This couldn't actually be happening. My mouth was gaping open as I was still staring forward. 

"Kurt!" I began wrap my lanky and undone arms around your body and started to violently shake you in an attempt to get you to look at the tv. I needed him to confirm this for me. This can't be seeing what I think I'm seeing.

You suddenly looked up, uninterested at first until he heard our voices booming loudly from the television set. Holy shit! How the fuck did they find us. We weren't necessarily a Motley Crue,  Guns N' Roses, or hell even a Megadeth. How the fuck were we on air?

It's was your turn to violently shake me now. 

"Clar! Clar! Are you fucking seeing this!"

"Holy fuck! Kurt we fucking made! Oh my god!" I started screaming hysterically and started jumping up and down on the couch full of excitement. It was such a ground breaking and earth shattering moment for us both. We both screamed in excitement like small girls. I was so hyped up that I jumped into your arms. You weren't so strong, but you were strong enough to twirl and spin me around.  This was one of the very few and far between moments that I ever felt so much joy that it felt like it exploded from within me and the aftermath just seeped onto the outside.

Our spazing out came to a close when our bandboxes began to vigorously and continuously call us. On my end you could hear Icy and Allision's excitement through the phone, and the same could be said about Kurt, Krist, and Dave. Fuck me life was just being fucking peachy and fucking amazing all of a sudden. This was such a drastic and stark comparison to the dread and dark attitude that just seemed to surround us on a daily basis.

I was so happy! And you were too! I felt like no one could burst our bubble or let the air out of our balloon. But it wasn't necessarily there to begin with. It was just a pretty facade to cover and temporarily ease our sadness. 

And this was a life changing event for both of us, but not in a good way. When I think of it now it is actually quiet malicious and detrimental to our deterioration as people, as individuals, and as human beings. From this day forth we were just some corporate product for sale. We were from then on some prop sold from the big wigs and rich gazillionaires at the top. At that very moment we were formally welcomed to the machine.

A/N: Yeah a happy chapter! I finally made one! Hoped you all enjoyed this!