Don't Close Your Heart (Ville Valo Fan Fic)

Chapter Seventeen

I sit down in front of a grave stone. It’s simple, small and has only a name on it. Alyssa Lane. I look down at my wrist and run my fingers over the scars. My mind travels back to when I gave myself those marks.

Skylar’s Flashback

I sit in the bathroom, crying. Bam had called and told me I was a whore and a waste of space and that he was glad I was gone. I slide the blade across my skin and watch the blood run down my arm. I do it a few more times.

“I’m home!” Ville shouts. I clean up my mess and go help him with the groceries.

The next day, I’m at work. I hand a customer his coffee. Manny comes over and grabs my arm. I jerk it out of his grip but I know he saw them. He doesn’t say anything, just shakes his head and heads into the back. That night, as I close the shop up, Manny wheels over to me and tells me to follow him. He has a rose in his hand

We walk in silence for a while. Manny leads me through a cemetery. He stops at a headstone. I look down at it and read the name on it. Alyssa Lane.

“I was born and raised in the United States. Alyssa was my first wife, before I went to war. We married in 1949. We lost our first child, waited a few years before we tried again. We were expecting another in ‘54 but that’s when the Vietnam War started. I was drafted, as most eligible men were. I served until ‘62, when I was honorably discharged. I took a bullet that was meant for my captain.” He coughs then continues.

“I came home expecting to see my wife and a beautiful baby, but instead I found an empty house and a note saying that Alyssa had killed herself. No one could give me a reason why she did it.” Tears well up in the old man’s eyes. “Seeing no reason to stay, I re-enlisted into the service and served until ’67, when I lost my legs and was discharged.”

“An old friend I went to school with, showed up one night at a bar I was in. I took her home and a year later we were engaged. She found out that she was pregnant and killed herself. She didn’t give a reason why.” The tears fall and I lay a hand on Manny’s shoulder. He reaches up and holds my hand. The tears fall but he doesn’t move to wipe them away. His eyes have glazed over as if he is reliving these memories.

“I took to drinking to deal with the pain. I even thought about killing myself a few times, but I never did."

“What stopped you?” I ask. Manny smiles and says, “One night I was about to jump off a bridge when a lovely voice cried out for me to stop.” “How could he jump off a bridge?” I think. Manny laughs at my confused expression.

It was difficult but I managed to pull myself up onto the bridge’s railing. Anyway, I looked towards where the voice came from. A beautiful woman with long, blonde hair and big, blue eyes was standing there. She ran over and hugged me, then started crying, begging me not to jump. I pulled out of her embrace and asked why did she care if I died. She told me that she knows what it’s like to lose someone to suicide and didn’t want my family to go through the pain of losing me. I snorted and told her that there wasn’t anyone who would cry over me. She said that she would. She walked over and helped me back into my wheelchair. After that, I started courting her, well I should say she started courting me.” He laughs but he turns somber again.

“I still couldn’t shake the sorrow I felt every time I thought about my losses. There would be times when I would go back to the bridge and think what would it be like to fall over the side. One time my episodes became so frequent that she would be standing there waiting for me. I wish I could say that I got over it, but there are times, even after all these years, when I will cry over the loss of two wonderful women and two babies that never got to live.” Manny lays the rose on the grave.