SHADOW

Blurred Lines

I sat across from her, words that I had been meaning to speak for a few weeks now, weighing heavy on the tip of my tongue.

I hadn't intentionally postponed this, but every time I was getting ready to discuss it, somehow, I would become distracted. Either she would unknowingly distract me, or my own infatuation would.

Really, I think what I needed to say was already known, but it still needed to be verbalized. It would give me the peace of mind that I needed.

My thoughts were interrupted by her petite hands lightly stroking over my knee.

"What."

She shrugged and shook her head. "Nothing, but..."

I waited patiently, observing the way she immediately tensed up and began to tremble slightly with nerves. I chuckled, but didn't say anything.

"I've never been in a situation where I had to say anything like this so..."

I leaned forward a little in anticipation, waiting for her to speak again.

"It's been almost 2 months since we've..., I guess met...right?"

I nodded, "Yes."

"I just feel like- I mean I think that me and you should...It should just be...us."

I cocked my head, faking confusion. "So...you want to do what with me?"

"If you're seeing someone else, I want it to stop." It came out like word vomit.

She took a long, deep breath to calm herself. "I just want it to be me."

I shrugged, "Ok."

Now it was her turn to be confused. "Wait...I didn't think it'd be that easy."

"Was it supposed to be difficult?"

"I don't know...I thought I'd have to argue or something."

"For future reference if you ever have to argue with someone to be exclusive they're probably not even worth it."

"Ok," she said slowly. "So you won't be seeing anybody else?"

"Correct." I eyed her seriously. "And I expect the same from you as well."

"I think that was a given," she laughed bitterly. "People don't look at me like that."

I couldn't help the loud laughter that bubbled out of my throat at the statement. She had to be joking but the look on her face told me that she thought that to be true.

"Love," I started as I tried to reign in my persistent laughter. "I can tell you right now that people looking at you like 'that' isn't the issue. You're actually very fucking pretty. Either people don't approach you because they're too scared or they don't know how to approach you correctly."

She looked at me as if I had just spouted completely new information to her. Which it probably was. Not having friends really does mess with a person's self-esteem after all.

"Don't look so surprised. You truly are a sight to see." I ran my tongue over my bottom lip slowly, looking her over, a playful glimmer in my eyes no doubt. "Luckily I got to you first."

She chuckled, and then tilted her head in thought. "Can I tell you something?"

I nodded, giving her the open floor to speak.

"I know I told you I always wanted my first time to be with someone that actually cared about me."

"Yeah, you did."

"Well the night of my birthday, I almost went home with somebody, but he ditched me and I'm really, really fucking thankful for that."

Yeah "ditched". He actually got his worthless fucking neck broken but she didn't need to know that.