20. Healing Takes Time

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I took the week to myself. I really didn't want to go back to school. I tried to explain to my parents that I just wanted to travel and got lost in the woods. I didn't tell them the story behind it or how I wasn't even sure I was coming back.

They promised to be better parents and were extremely kind to me the rest of the week. I visited Kenny on Tuesday and told him much of the same story I told my parents, except adding little bits about how I was sad into the mix. I made sure Craig wasn't evolved in my story when telling Kenny. I'm sure he already knew I arrived back with Craig.

He didn't seem too bothered, though he did give me a on going lecture like I thought he would.

Butters stopped by after school that Wednesday and gave me a home-made card. It had a drawing of me and him on the front, and inside was a message about how he didn't want me to leave. It did bring tears to my eyes, I had to admit. Butters was too pure for this world and I don't know why he is so nice to me.

Kevin had left something at my house's door step on Thursday. It was a note saying that he was glad I was okay, and if I ever wanted to talk about it he was there. The note had his number on it, and I had texted him saying thank you for caring.

On Friday, Craig stopped by with a big piece of paper with all the kids' from the school signature on it. It said 'Glad You Made It Home Safe!!!!' Across the top in bold letters. Even Cartman signed it, but he wrote some message on the bottom about joining him in some mission.

Craig said he couldn't stay long on Friday, so he left right after he gave me the poster. I took it upstairs, and rolled it up. I slid it under my bed so I wouldn't have to look at it. Not that I didn't appreciate the thought, I just really didn't want to think about how sad I was when I left.

The next week, I did go back to school. It was okay I guess, everyone either felt bad for me, or had some kind of conspiracy about me. I tried to not let it get to me.

I spent lunch sitting beside Craig. That was all great and dandy, besides Bebe sitting on the other side of him. That whole week she sat beside him, she'd wrap her hands around his arm and press her chest against him. It sharply reminded me that I could never have Craig.

It wasn't too bad though, I could distract myself with Jimmy's jokes or Clyde's and Token's constant old married couple bickering.

And Craig talked to me more than he did her at lunch, which helped. I could see her glare at me every time I made Craig laugh. Which only inspired me to do it more.

Kenny did seem to get upset for the first part of the week. Craig was definitely cocky about it too. Every time he saw Kenny frown towards us, Craig would wrap his arm around me, or start brushing his hand through my hair and scruff it up.

By the end of the week, Kenny gave up and just let it be. He did tell me that if Craig ever hurt me, that'd he kill him for me. Besides that, he accepted my choice to join Craig's friend group, seeing how happy I was around Craig. I started to get the sense that Kenny knew I felt something for Craig. I decided not to ask if he did, because it would blow my cover in the chance that he didn't know.

On Friday, Craig turned down a date with Bebe to go with me to the waterfall look-out. In person I tried to act sad that our plans over lapped, but on the inside I was bursting with glee.

Since him and Bebe were a 'thing', they were constantly going on dates. Craig didn't seem excited about them, but he never said no either.

But Friday was our day. We had planned it through texts for a while now, and not even Bebe could stop it.

-

When school ended that Friday, Craig and I walked out together. I walked beside him as we left, a small smile stuck on my face.

As we made some distance from the school, and neared the woods, Craig turned to me.

"I didn't bring any food, should we go get something?"

"I-AH- packed some PB and J sandwiches with some water in m-my bag."

"Oh nice, I love homemade food."

He smiled a closed eye smile before turning to walk us into the woods. I let him lead since he knew the way, and as I walked closely beside him, I could nearly touch his hand.

Both of our arms were swinging slightly from our walk, and every time that made it down, our hands almost crossed. For a moment, I thought about grabbing his hand. It just seemed so open at the moment, and my hand was so close.

Our hands did brush once, and I quickly retracted my arm to grab onto my shirt. I looked at Craig, but he didn't seem to notice at all.

By the time we got to our spot on the cliffs edge, both our stomachs were growling. We laid down are school bags that we carried with us. I brought out a blanket from my bag and laid it down so we wouldn't get dirty. I used our bags to make sure it stayed in place.

"Such a beautiful view." Craig said out of the blue, while his eyes scanned the opening.

"Yeah, it really is..." I sighed while staring at him. Though I knew I wasn't talking about the view of the lake, I was talking about the view I had of Craig. It was too bad Craig would never know that.

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