Smut

Escape (Ethan)

The audience was roaring with screaming and shrieking as Ethan and Grayson Dolan burst through a fake wall, their helmets sliding off their heads in the process. Ethan went tumbling to the ground, catching himself with his hands before propping himself up to his feet, smiling awkwardly with embarrassment although the whole thing was entirely staged. He was a better actor than he realized. They high-fived the fans along the short pathway to the TRL stage where the other co-hosts were waiting. They exchanged short hugs with the co-hosts before pulling their microphones to their mouths yelling a loud "WHAT'S UP GUYS!"
You stood off to the side, toying anxiously with your fingers as you watched your boyfriend run his fingers through his hair for the fifth time in five minutes. He hated being in the spotlight and although anyone who didn't know him would think nothing of it, you could visibly see his anxiety was getting the best of him. He had been in a pretty bad mood since he woke up but he still stood tall, faking a smile for the cameras and going along with whatever stupid shit TRL came up with. The show ended about an hour later and Ethan came running off to the side towards you. He hugged you for a split second before pulling away. You tried to ignore the sting of disappointment. Normally he was showering you with kisses after every show. In the eight weeks they had been filming it had become almost like a ritual. You had gone to every single show, following him around like some lost puppy and between all the trips back to Jersey, New York, L.A then back again maybe it was too much. You frowned. Maybe he wasn't in a bad mood, maybe he was just annoyed with you.
Ethan plopped down on the couch across from you and scrolled aimlessly through his phone while Grayson stood slumped back against the wall in the far corner finally exchanging numbers with one of the female co-hosts. Grayson had been pawning after her since the day they met but she had shown him no interest up until now.
You looked back over at Ethan who's face had fallen into his hands before sliding down to his neck which he massaged roughly. He glanced up at you but looked away before you could give him a comforting smile. Ouch. Jesus he was in a terrible mood and you had a two hour drive back to Jersey in only a few minutes. Great.
"Well..." Grayson sighed, locking his phone once his co-host had left the room. "Jeff just texted me and said the car is outside to take us back to the hotel to get our stuff and you know how much he hates waiting so we should probably get going."
It was true. Jeff, their manager, had very little patience but he always meant well. If it wasn't for him the boys would be late for everything.
You stood, grabbing your purse and nodded at Grayson. You glanced at Ethan who still sat slouched back on the couch.
"Dude." Grayson kicked Ethan's shoe causing his head to shoot up.
"Bro, what the fuck?!" Ethan shouted.
"Let's go, man! Stop being so god damn difficult! Mom wants us back in Jersey in time for dinner!"
Ethan sprung out of his seat, shoving past Grayson, bumping his shoulder along the way and headed out the back exit to the car. Grayson shot you a sympathetic look.
"I'm sorry." He sighed, motioning for you to exit before him like a true gentleman.
You shrugged. Ethan had been all over the place lately and you hated that you were getting used to it now.
The ride back to the hotel was short, awkward and silent. The three of you grabbed your bags quickly before before meeting Cameron in the lobby. You were thankful she had braved the nearly three hour drive from Jersey to NYC all by herself just to pick you guys up. Something Ethan probably wouldn't care about or acknowledge.
"Damn. Don't you three look miserable." Cameron scoffed when she took in your tattered state.
"Let's just go." Grayson grumbled.
"Thanks for coming to get us." You have Cameron a quick hug before clambering into the front seat.
"You're not gonna sit with E?" She frowned.
"No." You said curtly. And she left it at that. If there was one person who knew Ethan's temper other than Grayson it was certainly Cameron. She'd been on the receiving end of his mood swings more times than she cared for.
You plopped some headphones in and leaned your head against the window trying to drown out your worried thoughts. Were things going downhill with Ethan? What did this mean?
It was around 6 P.M. when you finally pulled into the Dolan household driveway. Lisa was already waiting by the door, her face nearly pressed against the glass as she rushed out to greet the four of you.
"My babies!" She cried. It had only been a week since she'd last seen you but it felt like an eternity for her. Your heart ached for her sometimes. It wasn't easy having your children live so far away only to be seen every so often.
Almost immediately though Lisa could tell something was off.
"What's got you so down?" She said to all of you but she was only really looking at Ethan who adjusted his backpack on his shoulder and shrugged. He glanced at you, expression unreadable before pushing past her to
go into the house. You must've been frowning because Lisa was staring at you intently but she didn't say anything, instead leading the way into the house.
"Dinners almost ready sweetie, let's go inside."
You walked in to see the table already set with forks and knives beside each plate. Immediately the familiar scent of vanilla hit your noses. Lisa always had vanilla candles burning. You followed Cameron and Grayson into the kitchen and peered at the stove. Mmmm. Spaghetti. 
You all sat seated at the table with Ethan reluctantly taking the only spot left which happened to be next to you. Lisa eyed the two of you curiously but still she remained silent. You weren't your usual giggly, drunk in love selves. Dinner seemed to drag on and you just wanted to head up to the guest bedroom and be alone. Lisa gathered the dishes and headed into the kitchen while Grayson and Cameron headed into the basement to watch a movie. They invited you to join but you weren't feeling up for it. Instead you followed Ethan, who was already racing up the stairs to his room, despite his protest that he just wanted to be alone. You were stubborn and you weren't going to spend the entirety of your time in Jersey with a moody boyfriend.
"What's going on with you, Ethan?" You said, placing your hands on your hips while Ethan fell back onto the bed, phone in his hands above his face.
"Hey." You raised your voice but he just laid there staring at whatever was so god damn interesting.
You could feel anger bubbling up inside you and before you could think of anything else you were snatching the phone from his hand and putting it in your back pocket.
"HEY, WHAT THE FUCK?!" Ethan shouted, sitting upright. He reached for his phone behind you put you pulled away.
"You're gonna fucking talk to me. Now what the hell is going on with you? Why are you treating me and everyone else like shit lately?"
Ethan sat there staring at you, smoke practically coming out of his ears.
"Just give me back my phone!"
"NO!" You shouted back well aware that the whole house could hear you by now.
"What the fuck is your problem?"
You expected a lot of things to happen at this point. Maybe he'd yell at you some more, maybe he'd punch another wall, maybe he'd leave the room, but you never expected him to do what he did. Cry. Not just a few tears. Ethan was full out sobbing in front of you. His face fell in his hands and your heart broke into a million pieces.
"I can't fucking do it. I can't handle this anymore." He whimpered into his hands, his voice breaking in the process. What was he saying?
"Ethan what.."
"This life. I didn't ask for this but we're in so fucking deep now. We have this god damn contract with TRL until the middle of next year, I never get any sleep, my Dad is sick, we have to make time to film videos that are actually entertaining in between all the fucking travelling and all this other bullshit. I CAN'T DO IT."
Tears were streaming down his face now as you watched your boyfriend break down in front of you. Honestly You hadn't realized you were crying too until your cheeks began to sting. You crouched down in front of Ethan, placing your hands on either side of his head and pulling his lips to yours. You knew he didn't want to talk anymore right now. He needed to forget. He needed an escape. He practically collapsed against you, throwing himself against the kiss and pulling you on top of him. You straddled his hips and grinded yourself against him.
"I'm so fucking sorry." Ethan whimpered beneath you. "I need to get a grip on my emotions."
"You don't need to get a grip, Ethan." You whispered against his neck, peppering it with kisses. "This is what happens when you bottle everything up, eventually you just explode. You've hurt my feelings yes and I'm sure some of your family too but baby you hurt yourself more when you aren't honest with how you're feeling."
Ethan looked up at you with glossy eyes, his hands digging into your hips.
"You're right." Ethan sighed. Sniffing back more tears. "God, I fucking love you. And I know I don't deserve you, but what would I do without you?"
You shrugged, smiling at him and for the first time in a little while he smiled back at you. You leaned down, kissing him roughly and tangled your fingers through his hair.
"You deserve me." You mumbled against his lips. "And I love you, too."
"You're so sexy." Ethan whispered in your ear as his fingers inched their way up your t-shirt. Eventually, growing impatient, he ripped the fabric from your body all together, leaning back afterwards to let you shimmy out of your jeans. He laid back, gawking at you when you sat there pressing right against his hardening cock in nothing but a skimpy bra and panties.
"Fuck." Ethan cursed under his breath. "I'm the luckiest guy on this planet."
He dug his fingers into the skin of your hips, pulling you forward to reconnect your lips. You grinded hard against him causing Ethan to gasp into your mouth.
"Fuck." He said again. "Do that again."
You happily obliged, circling your hips over his clothed erection before shifting back and digging your fingers into the waistband of his sweatpants and boxer briefs. You pulled them down with ease with Ethan helping you along the way while stripping himself of his shirt. In the mood to waste no more time you pulled your panties to the side, hovering above Ethan's hard cock before lowering down onto it until your thighs were touching his pelvis. Ethan groaned out, his face contorting in pleasure.
"God damn. You're so tight, baby."
You let out a heavy sigh as you eased yourself up and down Ethan's cock, going slow at first to allow yourself to get used to his girth. No matter how many times you fucked, you don't think you'd ever get used to his length.
"Fuck." You moaned, letting your head fall back as you began to move your hips back and forth instead of up and down. Ethan held onto your hips, guiding you. Through heavy lids you stared down at him while he watched you like his life depended on it.
"Beautiful." He whispered as you glided back and forth across him, coating him with your juices. You were so close. Your entire body felt like it was on fire as your orgasm built with every push and pull of your hips. Ethan laid underneath you, in a daze, as you dug your nails into the flesh of his chest.
"Just like that." He groaned. "Yeah baby, that's so good."
Ethan was close to his own peak and nearly lost it when you hit yours. Your entire body shook on top of him, your legs quivering at his sides. Your entire body tightened as you threw your head back, eyes rolling back into your head as you came..hard. Ethan followed soon after you, digging his nails tight into your skin as you both laid there trying to catch your breath. That was quite possibly the most intimate sex you'd ever had.
When you had both calmed down you laid down beside Ethan, curling up against his chest.
"I'm sorry." He said again, pressing a kiss to your forehead.
"Don't be." You shook your head against him.
"No, I am." He titled your face so you were looking at him now. "You don't deserve that shit. Neither do Grayson, Cameron or my parents. It's not fair for me to take it out on you guys when I'm going through some shit."
You nodded. That you couldn't really deny.
"I love you all so much, you especially, and I just...I'm just so sorry."
You placed a gentle kiss to Ethan's chin and then his lips. You kissed him a few more times before stroking the side of his face lovingly.
"It's okay. I know how hard it is to manage all the things you do. It's bound to get to you eventually."
"Thank you." Ethan whispered.
"Thank you for what?"
"For being my escape. You make me forget all the bullshit that goes on in my life. You keep me sane. So thank you."
You couldn't help the smile spreading it's way across your face.
"In that case...." You whispered followed by a kiss. "You're welcome."