Dreamer. [joshler]

twentyone. Confess

"Tyler?" I had hid in my room all day, shaking.

My nerves were everywhere, today was the day I'd tell Josh what's been happening. Today's the day I'll probably lose my only happiness.

"Tyler are you okay?" It startled me when he opened the door and walked in.

I quickly scrambled up and over towards him, spewing jumbled inaudible words. My breathing was so quick and I was starting to panic, tears began to form in my eyes.

"Woah, slow down. What's wrong?" He held my face with both hands and looked down at me concerned.

"I've gotta tell you something, I'm so s-sorry." He looked so lost and confused.

Carefully he pulled me over and sat down with me at the end of the bed, I fidgeted nervously with my hands.

"Tell me, what's wrong?" I bit my lip and looked at him, biting back tears.

"Ive been ch-cheating on you," his face went pale and expressionless, he just sat there staring at me with empty eyes.

"No..." he stood up and backed away, putting his hands in his hair and messing it up.

"I didn't want to-I was f-forced," he gave me a confusing look.

"It's S-Spencer-" I stopped to take a deep breath, saying his name hurt.

"He'd come over wh-whenever you l-left and force me to do th-things and sleep with him-I'm s-sorry–" the tears spilled from my eyes and I couldn't control my sobs.

"How long has this been going on?" I couldn't bring myself to look up at him.

"A m-month." I hung my head low, I felt so ashamed.

I jumped when I heard something break, Josh had knocked a lamp over. He strung his hand through his hair again and closed his eyes gritting his teeth, he looked so hurt and angry.

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" His voice was quiet which scared me.

"I'm so s-sorry, I was afraid of wh-what he'd do. I was a-afraid of what you'd d-do. I'm s-so sorry! I didn't want to he m-made me-forced me!" I was pleading again.

"Wait–so you weren't cheating if you were forced...so that means–" my eyes widened with realization and I brought a shaky hand up to my mouth.

I shook my head hastily and began scooting back.

"N-no, no–no-" more tears broke free from my eyes, he was right.

I scooted til I was in the middle of the bed, when I noticed this I squealed and scooted over the edge. This is where it happened, the one place I felt safe. Josh walked over to me and I shrunk away when he crouched down in front of me.

"P-please don't get mad at m-me," his face turned soft and he looked at me sincerely.

"I'm not mad at you Ty, you didn't mean it, you didn't have a choice. I'm mad at Spencer." I sobbed and pulled my knees to my chest, he wrapped his arms around my shoulders protectively.

"Shh, it's okay. Everything will be okay, you'll never see him again. I won't let anyone do anything like that to you ever again. You deserve the world, not this. Shh, let it out." I continued my uncontrollable crying.

After a while I had finally settled, Josh was very patient. When I looked at him he gave me a light kiss on the forehead.

"So uh, when you kissed Spencer, did you really kiss him or did he force you to do that too?" I gave him a look that practically told him the answer, and he got it.