Rough Patch

9

Tyler Joseph

After the presentations were done the teacher said we could stay with our kids since they had a fun rest of the day planned. The rest of the day consisted of the kids doing art projects relating to what they'd like to be when they grew up. I grabbed some things for Ellie to begin her project.

"So, Ellie, what do you want to be when you grow up?" I ask. Ellie looks around the room trying to think of what to say.

"I think I really really want to be like you daddy. I want to become a singer. I want to sing for this many people!" Ellie exclaims holding her hands out wide.

"Really? Do you like to sing?"

"Yes! I love going to music class and we sing in there! And you sing and I want to be just like you!"

"Aww, thats very sweet Ellie. So how are we going to do this art project?"

"I want you to do it."

"You have to help!"

"I will color."

"Fine. I have an idea." I say as I grab a small pencil. I started sketching out lightly a shape of a body and then a microphone. I cut it out and it was a singer holding a microphone. I slide it over to Ellie and she excitedly begins to color.

"Done!" Ellie says proudly. I look at the paper with colorful scribbles throughout. I can see she tried to make eyes, a mouth and hair.

"Its so pretty! Now, lets glue the back of this. Can you do that for me?" I ask. Ellie nods and grabs the glue stick and starts painting it on the back. I grab a sheet of pink construction paper and point to where Ellie should place it. I grab a sharpie and write, "WHEN I GROW UP, I WANT TO BE A SINGER!" on the top of the paper. I give the marker to Ellie and told her to sign her name on the bottom.

"Wow Ellie! That looks so good!" Mrs. Frank says from behind us.

"Thanks! My dad helped me a lot!" Ellie smiles.

"Can I go hang it up in the hallway?"

"Yes please!" Ellie hands over her art work and Mrs. Frank smiles at it and walks out into the hall.

At the end of the day, I take Ellie and we go back home. I get Ellie situated in the car and we head right on home.

"That was fun daddy! The best day I ever had at school!" Ellie exclaims. I look in my rear view mirror and see Ellie's big smile.

"I also think it was super fun!" I smile.

"I'm going to tell mommy all about it when we get home!" Ellie smiles even bigger and looks out the window. I focus my eyes back to the road and continue driving down the road to our home.

//—//
When we get home, I walk with Ellie inside but I had a plan I wanted to try and do. It was something I haven't done in a little while and I thought it was long over due.

"Mommy!" Ellie yells. Jenna comes down from upstairs looking gorgeous as always.

"Hi! How was school?" Jenna asks.

"It was the best day ever!" Ellie screams throwing herself at Jenna and Jenna picks her up.

"Thats great! How did daddy like it?"

"It was a ton of fun! We did a fun art project together too! Ellie, why don't you tell Mom all about this! I have to go do a quick errand and I'll be back super fast!"

"Okay!" Ellie smiles. I walk back outside and to my car and begin driving. The place I was planning on going was about 25 minutes from my house. The whole way there thoughts kept my mind at work. What was I going to say? Why was I even going here?

Then, I arrived. I drive through the open gates and slowly drive up a somewhat steep hill. When I get up, I find the giant oak tree and park next to it. I step out of car and walk closer to the tree and stare down at the headstone beneath me.

"Hey Josh. It's me" I breath. I haven't visited Josh's grave in quite sometime and talking about our band to Ellie's class made me want to talk to him.

"It's been a long time, man. Not a day goes by that I don't miss you. I miss you every single day. I miss our jokes and your drumming and your personality. I just miss having my best friend around. It's been 5 years. 5 fricken years. It seems like it was only yesterday. I can't let you go. I can't stop thinking of you. I keep having this weird thought that this was all a dream and I'm going to wake up and your still going to be here and we are still going to be in a band and we are still going to act like teens and do stupid things. But it's not a dream and your never coming back. I need to get that through my head. Your not coming back, man. I will never see my best friend again. It's just terrible because I wanted to be the best man at your wedding someday. I wanted our kids to be best friends and maybe follow in our footsteps and create a band. But that won't happen and I need to understand that. I'm going to continue missing you everyday but I'm also going to start living my life in a happier way. I'll come visit you every once in a while when I'm feeling down but I'm going to start being happier and being there for my wife and daughter. I'll talk to you soon, man. I'll love you always."