SHITTY SHITS

36

It's You Again

it's hard believing to what people say,
it really is.

like when they told me that you're out with another girl.
like when you're cheating me on my back.

i didn't believe that thing and just laughed.

but now...
i just...
i can't....

i can't find any right words to tell, to describe, to say what i've just seen.

you were REALLY out with another girl.
at the park near our school.
she was smiling brightly, looking at you, with her lavender-colored umbrella.

my heart...
i felt there's something that just pierced there.
it's hard to breathe.

my tears...
they're starting to come out.

i'm in public while writing this, on my way home.
that's why i can't shout.
i can't let it all out.
my heart beating so loud.

what happened?
i thought...
i thought were still gonna have a come back like korean idols do.
i thought we'll still have the chance to make it all new.

forget the pain we've caused,
the tears we've shed.

that's what you said just minutes before 19 ended.
the date were bounded to start our story.

it's all a fraud

30 minutes has passed now.
the thought of you together are still in my head.

i can't forget that.
i hate what i've seen.

it...
it fucking hurts!

you've broken my heart again.
and again.
and again.

***
it... hurts. 💔 i saw them together. right in front of my eyes.

how could i not know?

i know the way he walks. the way he pulls his hair up. his clothes. his shoes. EVERYTHING.

i wanna be oedipus rex. i've been blind by the world. i've been blind with the truth also.

i'm freaking out.

yes, i do have crushes and stuffs like that but, we've been together for almost 2 years now and... i still can't stop thinking about him.

fucking fucktards.